See that huge run up from breakeven? I've been trying to replicate that, focusing on doing things outside-in. Looking back, I was losing weight, getting out more, having a grand time, hence the reflection shows on my experience reality.

These days, as you will see on the latter part of the chart, I feel like my frequency is lower. I haven't been feeding myself well. I am in the neggies most of the time.

I'm going to shift now. I am going to feed myself well--this is primary. When I am ingesting healthy foods, I feel better about myself. I lose weight. I am more active. I'm not doing this to get the chart moving up again, but to feel better as a whole person.

Soon as I close this browser, I am going to do yoga.
i removed skype from my system last night. this so i'd stop wondering whether the deal was going to push through or not.

last week, i sent out messages to two potential investors whether they are interested or not. yesterday, i had the skype open, the two were online. one didn't respond back, while the other one kept me on hold for half an hour--twice. that's not how i'd play if i were interested. and it got me pushing uphill.

after i made the decision to give it up and allow what is, i still kept wondering at the back of my head if they replied or not. best way to get around it was to get rid of skype altogether. now i have peace of mind.

i am feeling better now.
i get it now. my poker has been on a downswing since last month. i found the trigger. my wife told me she had 6k in credit card debt. i had been racking my brain trying to figure out HOW to solve this issue.
i just got a message from the universe/higher self--stop looking for stakes.

somehow i had this notion that i need outside help to improve my poker. looking for a stake, things were a bit uphill going for me. it took all morning for me to realize that this was synchronicity telling me to look someplace else. it's not outside.

i quit my skype, took a walk, took a break from life and now i feel better.
Your playing small does not serve the world. There's nothing enlightened about shrinking, that other people won't feel insecure around you.

happy birthday!

I get it.

I did not like myself, and the universe reflected this in everything. I am overweight, things not running as expected--I did not like myself, hence I did not like what I was seeing in the mirror.

Now why would I not like myself? I was putting a condition on the outside, that if this is so and so, then I will like myself. Better yet, love myself.

I see that now. I get it. This is why I found it hard to be happy. I did not love myself unconditionally. If I did, then everything is a cause for celebration. It has always been right in front of me. Bashar has been saying this all along, but I never did get it back then because I never loved myself unconditionally. Now that I see it, the habit is gone. Just like that.

Today is my birthday. This is the best birthday gift ever.
today i am no longer doing the gabriel method. it is beyond my belief system. i'd rather do low carb and act on my excitement than to jump off the cliff with gm. i'm sure gm worked for a number of people. it's this and that.

synchronicities in my life helped me make that decision. i wasn't sure about gm, and i was gaining weight. i was in resistance with all this, and it was showing in my poker game that i had to shift back to 2nl. i feel like it is all outside and i cannot control it. but really, i do not control it. i, as the local mind can't do that. but working as whole person, higher mind and local mind, i can co-create my own reality.

what i will do now is operate from a higher frequency--lighten the diet and act on my joy at all times.

so be it.
I used to enjoy watching oprah, now I don't. It feels heavy, it's like watching the news. I feel bad after I turn off the tv. It's good to keep updated, but at the cost of me feeling bad about it.

So why am I feeling bad about it? What would I have to believe is true to feel that way? That I have no control over it? I, as in the local mind, really have no control over anything. Trying to control everything is futile. You can't. I can't, I mean. What then?

Just be in the state of being that I prefer. Then everything falls into place. Like this gabriel method thing. I don't really know how it will turn out. Already, I feel bloated for all this eating. So what's next? Start clearing the system. I ate bread. Ordinarily, I'd get junk food. I did not. I had a big loaf of bread for lunch, and butter. That is progress. Plus I walked going to the grocery.

Where am I going to get the fun part? I don't know yet. I am just open to all this. Let's see what happens from here.
I was looking into the possibility of joining a fitness center. Synchronicity says it's not yet time. I can't afford them at this time.

So be it. I am now open for something else.
I have been not dieting these last few days. There is a noticeable bulge in my midsection. This is to be expected. My body is still on echo mode, wanting to be sure if this is what I want. I have been practicing being in the moment, acting on my excitement. I started a thread on the gm forums to journal my results.

I went out for a brisk walk this morning. It was getting upstream on the tables so I decided to take a break. When I got home, I did not diet and ate what I wanted. I first had an apple, showered while I had two chicken thighs roasting. I then had a salmon kinilaw for appetizer and for the main meal, two chicken thighs with three servings of brown rice. I then had two cups of coke lite to wash them down.

I feel like my body is getting fat, but that's ok. I don't mind. I am shifting into that reality where my body is no longer in fat mode.

I remember those times when weightloss was so easy. I was eating as much as I wanted and I was having fun. I did not have any worries, or not as much. I was in the light. Now I am getting back that. There are the usual things to worry about. I just remind myself that if I cannot do anything about them right this moment, then I will not entertain those thoughts.
I think i'm on day three of the no more diet way. I'm eating whenever and whatever I feel like eating. This so my consciousness will know that I am no longer on a diet, and that I am open to that reality/experience where I will have perfect health simply by acting on my excitement.

I remember instances in my life when I was in perfect health. I remember those times that I was at peace at the least, or having a grand time living. In contrast, there were times when i was strictly following a diet and yet the pounds peeled off very slowly.

I've been on a diet for a long time now. i think synchronicity has shown me that there is a different way to do this, a more fun and enjoyable way of having perfect health. And I am, I have shifted to that reality.

In the past, after a carb meal, I always feel lethargic, feeling antsy. I don't feel that anymore when I have healthy carbs. I only get that way when I overdoes on junk food. This morning I had ice cream but saw to it that I ate nutritious foods first, have my fill, and then I ate ice cream. I did not finish the remaining ice cream. I did not feel like finishing it. I already was satisfied.
I am coming across a few negative reviews on the gabriel method. They claim that the method reads like a scam. I agree. Whoever wrote copy for that wasn't a good copywriter. They only praised the good points of the program, but did not balance them with cons to make it more believable.

What I am doing is not the gabriel method, but something I learned from bashar. What bashar says is that I should eat as light, as natural and as fresh as possible. The key is to get rid of the toxins we get from the environment, thus bringing the body into balance. When the body is in balance, it is in its optimal weight--meaning, not fat.

Wife is calling me for dinner. will continue this later.
we just had diner at kfc, and i am stuffed!

my local mind is having an issue about not having a diet. already i feel my tummy extended and feeling like i am headed to 200lbs. with thoughts and feelings like these, it is going to be a certainty. what do i do?

i can be open to the idea. if my local mind thinks i need to do low carb and follow my excitement to lose the weight, then that will work. as long as my local mind is resisting the not knowing, it's going to be tough and that conflict, resistance and anxiety is going to put me out of the light.

i wouldn't concern with that right now. i am already stuffed. i'll just enjoy the rest of the evening. the wife and kids still have ice cream. i don't think i want to have that. then i am going to bask in that knowing that i chose not to have ice cream anymore.

that much is different.

i can review poker hand histories instead, maybe play a game for an hour or two.
bashar said that evolution is adapting to new information.

I was reading the gabriel method while waiting for my daughter to finish her basketball practice--and it's really that easy. Everything that is shown in that book, i feel is a small part of what I have learned from bashar (others will say teachings of bashar, or some other teacher).

bashar was recommending a lightening of the diet with organic/fresh foods. alignment of the physical energy is achieved through exercise and diet and following your joy. But the basic tenet is to follow your joy to the best of your ability, with integrity.

that is the gist of what i am doing now. i have given up on dieting. i am now in the light of healthy living.

i just finished a set of poker. i feel like my energy is going down. i'm going to take a break, take a nap and let the kids play with the pc for now.
I revealed to my wife that i was doing a variant of the gabriel method. I explained to her how the mechanism works as I understood it, but only from the physical point of view and not the metaphysics side--I'm not sure she is ready for it.

I allowed myself to have wine gums and a big pizza bread yesterday. I did not feel as drunk as I did before. In fact, I enjoyed that meal and chose not to feel guilty or bad about it. I do not really know how this is going to work, but I am open to the concept, plus there is the forum where other people have made it work in their lives. With models like that, I too, can make it work with mine.

This morning, I had my salmon, and a burger patty, plus coke lite. I drove the wife to work, and the kids came along as wife wanted to buy them churros. Marcus didn't want his so I ate his.

vian has basketball practice after lunch. There's still one burger patty plus chicken schnitzels for the kids. Wife might grocery when she gets out from work.
the theory is this--that part of my brain that runs my body, the autonomic nervous system, this determines (probably) when my body will accumulate fat or not. The stimulus was stressful situations as defined by my habitual/predominant thoughts and emotions.

I have been stressed since we arrived in nz. fear and anxiety. business. i am aware of that now.

I am directing my thoughts and emotions into vibrations of peace, joy and abundance. I don't know how the mechanism will react or make the weightloss happens. the local mind cannot grasp that for now, but this is the direction i am given by my higher self.

*This was a picture from my college days. I am the guy on the right wearing the orange shirt. Those were my best form physically. I was lifting weights, riding my bike, running 5ks.
I walked to foodtown and bought myself carbs. I am officially no longer on a diet.

day one

i just read the book, gabriel method. it is synchronicity providing proof that it is possible. the book in itself is not complete, so i will post on this blog everything about:
- being in perfect health;
- running a profitable and enjoyable business
“You are now beginning to allow yourself to know that the dream reality and the physical reality is no longer on this hand, on that hand – this or that. It is one and the same experiential reality. One and the same! With slightly different definitions to how you allow yourself to experience it. So! What will be a result of your allowance that you will literally begin to live, physically live your dreams. You will know that physical reality is a dream and therefore can be recreated in any format you wish. Physical reality is very malleable, very malleable! But because your physical reality dream contains the belief that it is not, then you don't experience it as such, in a conscious way, even though you experience it all the time."
Bashar's famous aphorism: DEPRESSION IS MEDITATION JUDGED.

Not implying that you are or consider yourself depresssed (you don't sound like it) but..... there are times when the world is overwhelming, confusing, and the only obvious thing one wants to do is curl up in a ball and sleep.

When that is the case, one should do that, just retreat and let the internal processes do their thing until you come out clearly knowing your next path of action. Bashar said (paraphrased) that that is a meditation, it is very necessary, good and right to do, and should not be labeled as "depression" or anything else as that is inappropriate putting down of self, a judgment of "there's something wrong with me because I can't cope with the chaos like everyone else does".
"So, the higher self is like a guiding principle, a governing principle, so to speak. That is a part of your complex as a person but is the non physical component that acts is a conduit to even higher versions of your soul, of your being, of your spirit. But also acts as the intermediary between those higher levels the physical personality construct and can distill information from the he higher spirit soul, oversoul levels in a way that the personality can understand"

Kill Your To-Do List

Posted: 27 Apr 2010 07:23 AM PDT

Post written by Leo Babauta. Follow me on Twitter.

Most people reading this will have a to-do program, or a paper list or text file, listing not only projects and tasks but separate lists for home and work and possibly half a dozen different contexts.

Those who don’t have a to-do list probably feel they should, because they’re swamped and feeling overwhelmed.

I’m here to suggest: kill your to-do list.

It sucks up your time, and drains your motivation. Those who have to-do lists usually manage them constantly, or if they don’t they fall into disuse and get dusty and become worthless, while the person who’s fallen behind in maintaining the list feels constantly guilty. For those who keep up with the lists, they spend a lot of time on the lists they could be spending … doing something important.

And what of these lists? They’re long, you never get to the end of them, and half the time the tasks on the list never get done. While it feels good to check items off the list, it feels horrible having items that never get checked off. This is all useless spending of mental energy, because none of it gets you anywhere.

The only thing that matters is the actual doing.

So what’s a better system?

The One Thing System

Here’s what I do, and highly recommend to anyone willing to break free of the to-do list:

1. I wake up in the morning, and decide what One Thing I’m excited about.
2. Then I focus on doing that, pushing everything else aside, clearing distractions, and allowing myself to get caught up in the moment.
I don’t worry what else is on my list, because there’s only One Thing on my list. I don’t have to check anything off, because I don’t actually have a list. I don’t have to worry about things not getting done, because I do the only thing I want to do — if I didn’t want to do it, it wouldn’t be my One Thing.

If I happen to finish my One Thing early, I can slack off for the rest of the day (my favorite strategy), or I can pick my next One Thing.

But … but …

What about the other things you need to do? What if you forget them?

Make a list of possible things to do, if you like, or routine tasks that need to get done for one reason or another. I would consider eliminating as many things as possible on the routine list, as they tend to just be friction that stops you from doing what you really want to do. If you do make a list, don’t consider it a to-do list, of things you need to check off. Just keep it as a reminder, and don’t spend any time other than adding things to it and possibly checking it once a day.

Even this list isn’t necessary, but I only suggest it here for those who don’t feel safe without it. If you really don’t want to forget something, you can put a reminder on your calendar. I suggest avoiding this when possible, but if I need to send out payments once a month, I’ll put a reminder on my calendar. It’s not that complicated.

For the important things, you tend to know what you really want to get done. If you’re a writer, you know what you want to write, usually. If you’re a designer, you already have an idea of what you’re excited about working on. You don’t need a list. You just need to forget about the list, and get working.

Kill your to-do list, and forget about all the things you need to do … except the One Thing you’re passionate about, right now.
Seth: "...Your Christ had abilities which I still do not have...and he did appear in your form, but he was not of your form...Your people saw but a small fragment that they could understand.. .a fragment that was part of a larger reality they could not understand.. ."

"There is no real division between you and God and I...only a unity that you cannot as yet understand.. ."

"Prayer is very important... "

"You are part of God in that you are part of the consciousness that is, but you are not apart from a god who looks down on you and speaks...There is indeed as you conceive of it no hell or heaven...These ideas have been distorted through the ages...You could call hell a separation from the main stream of consciousness called God, but this is impossible actually..."

Peggy asks what religion in his opinion, comes closest to God as defined by Seth:

Seth: "I do not want to puncture your idealistic balloon. Buddhists
are perhaps closer, but no religion comes close really...

The man or woman feeling identity with each day that passes comes close.

Sentiment is practical.

The idea of birth and death each day is close.

Those who cry when they hurt a flea come close.

Those who appreciate the consciousness in every rock, tree, bird come close. Fools and idiots are often wiser than the wise man.

Hatred is death.

All things are sacred and every thought is a reality and has it own
potential for creation and destruction.

Experiencing every moment comes close...

I myself am not known for humility. Nevertheless my existence is dependent upon many things of which I know not. I learn through many existences, but I do not set myself up as many of you set yourself up, and I do not determine what shall be destroyed or who or what shall remain...such actions...are based on cowardice...

...Any idea of a God, no matter how distorted, will triumph, for He exists in everything that you know.

And when you kill so much as an ant, so do you kill part of Him in most practical terms.

When you kill in thought, you kill indeed."
Host So it's fair to say if we are experiencing a reality that is less than pleasant for us, in no small part, we are responsible for that.

B: Yes, but we do not mean to imply that that means blame.
Responsibility, TOTAL responsibility, for the creation of YOUR reality means ultimate freedom in that way.

And it takes Acknowledging that YOU have created perhaps Acknowledging, that YOU may have unconscious, or sub conscious beliefs, or fears within YOU that can attract these realities.

Negative though they may be to YOU.

And in recognizing that YOU have those beliefs, in Acknowledging that YOU have those fears, then YOU own them. And simply remember if YOU wish to change anything, YOU cannot transform something YOU do not own. So first YOU must own the idea that what YOU do experience in YOUR life is YOUR creation. That puts YOU, as you say squarely in control, as you say, in the drivers seat. And then YOU can steer YOUR vehicle through life along the path YOU desire, once YOU know, YOU are firmly in control.
But the easiest way to do that is to recognize that the realty YOU experience is YOUR creation to begin with, even though it may be a subconscious creation.

Host: And that element of fear it would seem that what you're saying would back up what is commonly held in psychology, and I think religion, and certainly in philosophy, and that is; Fear is our biggest enemy.

B: In a sense it was truly stated in YOUR world that the only thing that YOU do in fact have to fear is the fear itself.

Because there is Nothing, Nothing, No Thing, inherent about any circumstance or situation that needs to create a negative result. Only the Fear, the Doubt, the Belief, in LACK of self empowerment generates the negative effect out of the circumstances that YOU then become fearful of.

And becoming fearful of the effects YOU generated with YOUR belief, to begin with, YOU may then reinforce that fear through the experiences YOU create.
But the experiences YOU have in life, they do not create the belief to begin with. The belief within YOU creates the experience which may then reinforce the belief and then re create the experience and catch YOU up in that cycle that YOU call your catch twenty two.

So simply it takes an understanding that if belief creates the experience. Once YOU change the belief, YOU will change the experience.
And we guarantee YOU 100 % that is the affect that will occur.
YOU can do it for yourselves and create the proof YOU need for yourselves to see that it will occur.
i once observed a child throwing stones at a pair of ducks.

my body welled up with "no!" and i wanted to put a stop to the act.

however, i allowed it, and did not feel good about that allowance.

and so, i asked bashar about this challenge.

his first reply was "did they duck?"

i laughed and said 'yes, they ducked"

bashar replied; "ah, good, then they were being true to themselves!"

after i stopped laughing i asked bashar about allowing others to cast stones when it does not feel good to observe the casting. this was his reply:

"you are recognizing a vibration that is contrary to your true, natural self. your process is to radiate an example of how else it could be done but without the assumption or expectation that they must follow, because, only through unconditional allowance do you actually give them the best opportunity to change their behavior."
Wife, last night, disclosed that her boss is not happy with the work that she is doing. That she will have to talk with HR sometime soon this week.

I took this news as bad news. That was my initial reaction. But through the night, I shifted myself. This circumstance has no meaning. It is neutral. It can be good or bad, depending on how I choose to see it. I saw that I was putting a negative meaning to it initially. That's not how I prefer things to be.

Here's what I get from this:

This situation is synchronicity I play poker and am playing well. I see this as something that I enjoy doing. this is something that I enjoy doing, and at the same time, make money out of it. I wanted to show my wife that I can make money out of it, but to explain this to her, I don't think she will see it as a regular job that people should be doing.

So I don't have to tell her about it. I'd continue doing this. I'll continue following my highest excitement--without expectation. This saturday, I am attending that free poker tournament in albany. I don't know how things will work out. That's the beauty of it. The paradox. These days, I'd choose something which I don't know how things are going to turn out than to choose something that I know how it will turn out.

Like playing poker over getting a regular job. I know how it will be when I get a job. I've been down that road before. I don't like it. I never lasted in one job for more than a year. I have a better time doing what excites me. There was a time in my life when that's what I just did. Aikido.

I took up aikdio not knowing how I will be able to pay for the monthly fees. Turns out, the teacher let me lead class, promoting me to a higher level to do so. Then he let me handle one of his dojos, and I made a small income out of it. Small, but enough to get by. I made friends along the way.

Still following my excitement, I became a stockbroker (something I really wanted to do) and made a lot of money from it that I was able to get my little brother to work there too and he too made money.

I met my wife through aikido. We were good friends. I enjoyed spending time with her. A lot. We enjoyed doing the same things, together with out friends, or just the two of us. We got married and now we have four wonderful kids.

And now we live in New Zealand. Something I did not expect to happen soon, but it did, in a grand way.

Now the universe just opened a new door. This is part of the synchronicity. I don't know what's going to happen enxt. I don't want to put expectations on it. I'm giong to just let this be and see what happens.