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happy birthday!

I get it.

I did not like myself, and the universe reflected this in everything. I am overweight, things not running as expected--I did not like myself, hence I did not like what I was seeing in the mirror.

Now why would I not like myself? I was putting a condition on the outside, that if this is so and so, then I will like myself. Better yet, love myself.

I see that now. I get it. This is why I found it hard to be happy. I did not love myself unconditionally. If I did, then everything is a cause for celebration. It has always been right in front of me. Bashar has been saying this all along, but I never did get it back then because I never loved myself unconditionally. Now that I see it, the habit is gone. Just like that.

Today is my birthday. This is the best birthday gift ever.
today i am no longer doing the gabriel method. it is beyond my belief system. i'd rather do low carb and act on my excitement than to jump off the cliff with gm. i'm sure gm worked for a number of people. it's this and that.

synchronicities in my life helped me make that decision. i wasn't sure about gm, and i was gaining weight. i was in resistance with all this, and it was showing in my poker game that i had to shift back to 2nl. i feel like it is all outside and i cannot control it. but really, i do not control it. i, as the local mind can't do that. but working as whole person, higher mind and local mind, i can co-create my own reality.

what i will do now is operate from a higher frequency--lighten the diet and act on my joy at all times.

so be it.
I used to enjoy watching oprah, now I don't. It feels heavy, it's like watching the news. I feel bad after I turn off the tv. It's good to keep updated, but at the cost of me feeling bad about it.

So why am I feeling bad about it? What would I have to believe is true to feel that way? That I have no control over it? I, as in the local mind, really have no control over anything. Trying to control everything is futile. You can't. I can't, I mean. What then?

Just be in the state of being that I prefer. Then everything falls into place. Like this gabriel method thing. I don't really know how it will turn out. Already, I feel bloated for all this eating. So what's next? Start clearing the system. I ate bread. Ordinarily, I'd get junk food. I did not. I had a big loaf of bread for lunch, and butter. That is progress. Plus I walked going to the grocery.

Where am I going to get the fun part? I don't know yet. I am just open to all this. Let's see what happens from here.
I was looking into the possibility of joining a fitness center. Synchronicity says it's not yet time. I can't afford them at this time.

So be it. I am now open for something else.
I have been not dieting these last few days. There is a noticeable bulge in my midsection. This is to be expected. My body is still on echo mode, wanting to be sure if this is what I want. I have been practicing being in the moment, acting on my excitement. I started a thread on the gm forums to journal my results.

I went out for a brisk walk this morning. It was getting upstream on the tables so I decided to take a break. When I got home, I did not diet and ate what I wanted. I first had an apple, showered while I had two chicken thighs roasting. I then had a salmon kinilaw for appetizer and for the main meal, two chicken thighs with three servings of brown rice. I then had two cups of coke lite to wash them down.

I feel like my body is getting fat, but that's ok. I don't mind. I am shifting into that reality where my body is no longer in fat mode.

I remember those times when weightloss was so easy. I was eating as much as I wanted and I was having fun. I did not have any worries, or not as much. I was in the light. Now I am getting back that. There are the usual things to worry about. I just remind myself that if I cannot do anything about them right this moment, then I will not entertain those thoughts.
I think i'm on day three of the no more diet way. I'm eating whenever and whatever I feel like eating. This so my consciousness will know that I am no longer on a diet, and that I am open to that reality/experience where I will have perfect health simply by acting on my excitement.

I remember instances in my life when I was in perfect health. I remember those times that I was at peace at the least, or having a grand time living. In contrast, there were times when i was strictly following a diet and yet the pounds peeled off very slowly.

I've been on a diet for a long time now. i think synchronicity has shown me that there is a different way to do this, a more fun and enjoyable way of having perfect health. And I am, I have shifted to that reality.

In the past, after a carb meal, I always feel lethargic, feeling antsy. I don't feel that anymore when I have healthy carbs. I only get that way when I overdoes on junk food. This morning I had ice cream but saw to it that I ate nutritious foods first, have my fill, and then I ate ice cream. I did not finish the remaining ice cream. I did not feel like finishing it. I already was satisfied.
I am coming across a few negative reviews on the gabriel method. They claim that the method reads like a scam. I agree. Whoever wrote copy for that wasn't a good copywriter. They only praised the good points of the program, but did not balance them with cons to make it more believable.

What I am doing is not the gabriel method, but something I learned from bashar. What bashar says is that I should eat as light, as natural and as fresh as possible. The key is to get rid of the toxins we get from the environment, thus bringing the body into balance. When the body is in balance, it is in its optimal weight--meaning, not fat.

Wife is calling me for dinner. will continue this later.
we just had diner at kfc, and i am stuffed!

my local mind is having an issue about not having a diet. already i feel my tummy extended and feeling like i am headed to 200lbs. with thoughts and feelings like these, it is going to be a certainty. what do i do?

i can be open to the idea. if my local mind thinks i need to do low carb and follow my excitement to lose the weight, then that will work. as long as my local mind is resisting the not knowing, it's going to be tough and that conflict, resistance and anxiety is going to put me out of the light.

i wouldn't concern with that right now. i am already stuffed. i'll just enjoy the rest of the evening. the wife and kids still have ice cream. i don't think i want to have that. then i am going to bask in that knowing that i chose not to have ice cream anymore.

that much is different.

i can review poker hand histories instead, maybe play a game for an hour or two.
bashar said that evolution is adapting to new information.

I was reading the gabriel method while waiting for my daughter to finish her basketball practice--and it's really that easy. Everything that is shown in that book, i feel is a small part of what I have learned from bashar (others will say teachings of bashar, or some other teacher).

bashar was recommending a lightening of the diet with organic/fresh foods. alignment of the physical energy is achieved through exercise and diet and following your joy. But the basic tenet is to follow your joy to the best of your ability, with integrity.

that is the gist of what i am doing now. i have given up on dieting. i am now in the light of healthy living.

i just finished a set of poker. i feel like my energy is going down. i'm going to take a break, take a nap and let the kids play with the pc for now.
I revealed to my wife that i was doing a variant of the gabriel method. I explained to her how the mechanism works as I understood it, but only from the physical point of view and not the metaphysics side--I'm not sure she is ready for it.

I allowed myself to have wine gums and a big pizza bread yesterday. I did not feel as drunk as I did before. In fact, I enjoyed that meal and chose not to feel guilty or bad about it. I do not really know how this is going to work, but I am open to the concept, plus there is the forum where other people have made it work in their lives. With models like that, I too, can make it work with mine.

This morning, I had my salmon, and a burger patty, plus coke lite. I drove the wife to work, and the kids came along as wife wanted to buy them churros. Marcus didn't want his so I ate his.

vian has basketball practice after lunch. There's still one burger patty plus chicken schnitzels for the kids. Wife might grocery when she gets out from work.
the theory is this--that part of my brain that runs my body, the autonomic nervous system, this determines (probably) when my body will accumulate fat or not. The stimulus was stressful situations as defined by my habitual/predominant thoughts and emotions.

I have been stressed since we arrived in nz. fear and anxiety. business. i am aware of that now.

I am directing my thoughts and emotions into vibrations of peace, joy and abundance. I don't know how the mechanism will react or make the weightloss happens. the local mind cannot grasp that for now, but this is the direction i am given by my higher self.

*This was a picture from my college days. I am the guy on the right wearing the orange shirt. Those were my best form physically. I was lifting weights, riding my bike, running 5ks.
I walked to foodtown and bought myself carbs. I am officially no longer on a diet.

day one

i just read the book, gabriel method. it is synchronicity providing proof that it is possible. the book in itself is not complete, so i will post on this blog everything about:
- being in perfect health;
- running a profitable and enjoyable business