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i tried playing at 5nl and kept hitting a wall. i am going back to 2nl and grind up my bankroll again. this might take a few days to a week. that's ok. i guess that was variance. i think i was calling too much. or is it differernt at that level? i think i had it going at that level before. i just need to sort things out.

i am waiting for the chicken to get cooked. i will have lunch then. i haven't had lunch. i walked twice to foodtown as the clerk forgot to put the soap inside the bag. it was hot. it was my workotu for the day. i am not happy with the work i do over there. i want to do something else. i want to be in charge. why not sell my own product? this way, i don't have to work for soomeone else. what do i sell?

a poker book. i can use that. what else? when do i start working on that? Where will the threshold be? Sell it for a dollar. a thousand a month is good. how many people play poker anywyay? there's a lot. i will work on that one of these days. i have so much fear and anxiety in me. i just observe them. i do not try to sweet talk my way out of it. the energy is there. it is meant for me to use it.

it is not the state of being that i prefer, but it is the energy that i am in. use it. this is converting. turning water into wine. is that what it meant? i think so. there is still a lot of junk in me. i am hungry. i will take a nap after i finish eating my lunch. it is about time for that anyways. i can do a lot o fthings. daughter is doing art work everyday. she is an artist. how did that get there? i don't know.

she just started doing art and i reinforced her in that. i don't know where this is headed. i just go where the river takes me. this is where i am right now. these blogs were not meant to make any sense. these are for writing practice. this is where the connection is made. there are good parts in this blog. i think i copied them from some book. but it is buried deep within and i will have to look for them.

it's ok. it will be there when someone else needs them. what will happen to all these pages in a hundred years? i don't know. a lot of things can happen in a year. i am not learning programming anymore. i can do something else instead. like what? do forum stuff. i don't want to think too much, but forum things are a great way to do marketing. i will do that later then. do one or two then do my own stuff.

i am looking for something differernt. why not sell my own stuff then? i can write something then publish then sell. what sells? weightloss. everyone else is doing that. what else can i do? i have a blog about it but it is going nowhere. i am too preoccupied with something else. two lines of these are enough and it comes out two a paragraph that is four to six lines long.

when i get to the second line, i just keep writing until i get past the median line and then i move on to the next paragraph. i am constantly making tweaks to the sales funnel. the copy is always evolving. this is part of the lesson. i am always learning something new. evolution is adapting to new information. that is why i am evolving as a writer. this is part of the process for me.

i write everyday. even if it were not morning pages, i am still writing. lately the well feels dry. this is why i am going back to morning pages. i learn something when i pracrice these. i wonder if abacus is still there? With the internet, there are a lot of ways for a trader to make money. for one, just publish a website blog and the audience will follow.

i had a forex blog before and i was getting inquiries for managed accounts. i can still go back to that but i can't get oanda to run. maybe i can do that from win7? I can try that right now. what else? it was the account that did not seem to work. there is giong to be another round of documentation for that. i can do something else instead.

right now, i am up to my nexk with this work. i can't pay attention to trades anymore. i can do a blog. i can do like hourly trades. i can open a mini account. a micro account even. the forex blog is still there. i know a bit better about internet marketing. i can get clients that way. i will head over there right now and see what i can do.

Computer wallpapers /