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I have time to write, so I do the morning pages. I have just finished a poker session. I time it to one hour, do that four times each day. This is my job from here on. This is to raise funds for the bike tour that I am going to have.

There is a katmandu outdoors shop in albany. I can go ride over there. I seem to remember going there. I can go there today, or in the weekend. It will take an hour to get there and back. If there is not enough time today, I can go on the weekend. There'd be plenty of time for that then.

I have not been to brown's bay yet. I can get the tent and pannier from amazon. But the question is, how do I pay for the credit card? I have been down this road before. Things are different. I know things now. I am a different being than I was before.

The logic says, wait out the winter, then get the stuff. There might be some sale coming into the winter. These shops will want to unload old stuff before the spring sets in. that's when people are going to start buying stuff.

The conditions tell me that this is nto the right time. Although the opportunity is there, the circumstances do not say so. The reflection says not yet. What to do now? I also have the hospital to pay. I will get there eventually. Only thing is, I am going through contrast. I will allow this then. This is part of the process.

What else is there to write about? The spelling sometimes sucks. That's ok. No need to make edits to that. Only pay attention to what is important to you. I have a website. It will get traffic. I am going in that direction. We learn by going where we have to go. That is what I am learning now. Also, do more with less. That is the bike tourist ethic. That is how we are.

There was this one year off travelogue that I borrowed from the book. But that is not what I am looking for. The guy travelled all over the world looking for adventure. He has money and he was looking for boutique adventures. Not my thing. I think the real adventure is going out there and finding the adventure without having to pay for it. Or find means to get the adventure. Like synchronicity. That is what I am about.

Still, that is a valid experience. To them, it works. But there are a lot more people out there who will ride out. I don't enjoy going through a country on a bus on tour. I'd rather go a tenth of the country by bike and tent. That is more hands on for me. This is what works for me.

How to play poker while on tour? I can play half day, then ride the second half. I can tour the oecd countries. These will have internet connections at the end of my rides. That will allow me to play poker. Or I can stay in hotels. I don't know yet how that is going to be possible. This time around, I have the commitment. I have variance playing on my side.

I am able to keep expenses down, and the potential for home runs are always there. Sometimes they win, more times, I also get my share of the pie. The thing is, I am investing in my meta game all the time. This is why I play.

I observe other people I can go all in when this guy three bets. Then I will see how that fares. They might call with lighter hands. I see that. That is part of the equation. I will go there. There is variance. How to deal with that then? I don't know. But it will be as painful for them as it is to me.

What if they do not care about the money? Then that is the lesson there for me. How to deal with that then? I don't know yet. Just get to the other side. I get there when I get there. I post these when I finish writing, then move on to the other side.

I write everyday, almost. This is the practice. Sometimes, I need to spend more time with the writing. I have julia cameron's book, the right to write. I don't think i've read this one just yet. The other books were not as good as the artist's way. That was a classic. Is it good to have home run books like that?

Of course.

They are part of the process. This is what I am going through. It seems to be going to be a good day again today. It is cold. That's because we are going into winter. But the cold is more manageable this time. It is not as tough as before. This is alright. I can handle this.

I want to get that tent now. And the pannier. Will I be able to ride out as often? Of course I can. I am going to the gym. I am going for weekend rides. The kids can learn how to set up the tent. Wife and I can sleep in the car...

I think we can make that work. The kids can learn how to set up the tent. Where else can I get funds for that? There is the poker account. If needed, I can use the funds then start over again. The only thing that's stopping me is that I might not be able to play. That's a bummer then.

But I am being considerate and I am more aware this time. Things are different this time. I am going out soon as I finish these. I have time. No need to hurry.

I am stopping by the hospice shop. I need to text wife for the magazine money and the bread. I can stop by food town later. I am also doing yoga later on after my nap. I sleep in the afternoon. If I don't, I crash early evening. Or I go to sleep early.

That's what I am right now. I don't know how things are going to get from here to there. That's the fun part. That means that the page is blank. It is up to me how this story will unfold. If I knew what is going to happen, then there is going to be no surprise with the present. That is why it is a present. It is a gift. And you do not know what is inside the gift.

If you know what is going to happen next, where's the fun in that?