sunday 7.52pm

I am feeling down again. I guess I am responding to the reflection. I am not the creator in this case. I spent the whole day in the house. I thought I was being productive. I could have gone out, rode my bike. There's too much contrast going on around me. What to do?

Allow it to be. Just be in the moment. That spam thing in odesk, that is in the past. I responded to it already. I withdrew the application. That is not in the present. It is already in the past. I see that. I don't think I will want to work with such a client. Doesn't know what a good proposal is.

Maybe that's how my cover letter looks like. I don't know maybe I need outside look or something. But if it has to start with dear abbey, I don't think that's where I want to go.

Anyway. I learned something there. I will put that in the compost bin. I had rock melons. Should have done that? Probably not. I had day one yesterday. I can ride tomorrow when they are gone off to their day. I can ride someplace else. Like go to the albany library. I like going to the beach. I can go to devonport or something.

I am starting a new contact on monday. I will do an hour or two of work there, then go out for a break and see what I can do. It's not much but this is what I am going to do for the rest of the year. I will bring up hours worked to one thousand hours. In the process, I am going to sharpen my writing skills.

I am also learning web development. I have some resistance to learning python. I like ruby's syntax, but there is not much resources out there that I can use. Besides, I probably don't have anything that will make for a good project. Right now, I am building a web blog. I can move all of my blogs out over there.

I am thinking of making a forum for freelancers. The one we have on facebook is not easy to use. You can't find conversations in there that are good like in stackexchange. Why not make it like reddit?

I think we can start a subreddit for that and go from there. People from odesk facebook can go there and vote up vote to their heart's content. Is it possible to start a sub reddit?

You are anonymous in that space. Why is the crunchbang going on standby? I put the screensaver on cancel. Maybe there is something else. I am syncing my files on dropbox. That way, next time I need to use something in there, it is already installed.

Crunchbang is so much faster than the lightest ubuntu. Lubuntu is still slow on that old pc. Crunchbang is more efficient, but it's not that easy to use. I can get used to it if I had to. I can customize it to my needs. There's just a lot of research to do in there.

I need to make changes also to the tags on the blog. It is now ubuntu. I can change that to linux. That way, it will be easier to look for information. Did I have a productive day today? Was I better by one percent today than I was yesterday? Doing morning pges is one percent better today. Even if I were to do this everyday as a habit, I am getting better by one percent each day.

If I were to make the choice, I am getting better by one percent. This is the habit I have right now. That new wallpaper looks like the view from the sky tower. The kids had a grand time then. Those are good folks. I can be like that. I am like that. I am. It's not out there in the future. I am like that even without the money. That's what is different there. I can help people even if I did not have money.

In separate occassions, I have helped people for free. In a different situation, they would have paid a hundred bucks for the service I gave them. I fixed their pc. It is not just three times, but more than that. Different persons. Different situations.

In that way, I gave of myself. That is more than what money can buy. You can't get that from anywhere else. I am starting day one tomorrow. It's going straight this time. I have direction. I have proof elements that it is going to work.

I can choose to stay with blogger. It is where I can write better. With appfog, I practice web dev. Right now, I am a white belt with that. Be patient young grasshopper. You will get there after ten thousand practice days.

It is not that easy. That is why I am making it easy for myself to learn it. I watch videos. I look for tutorials. It is thru experience that I learn better. When I watch a video, I follow along. This is how questions are raised. I remember that trip through punta. I used to do that a lot. I have moved on from there. I am a different person now. I am going to poop after this.

I think this is the rock melon. What else is there to do with crunchbang? I think I have everything running well right now. I can go check later on and see.

I can install monaco font. I think I can just move the font over to that folder then run that fc command on sudo. That will update everything that is the easier way to do it then.

I can do that after I poop. The kids will have sandwich for dinner. They are busy with their own thing. I am busy with mine. This is what it's like when the mom is not around. I used to have dinner with them. But they don't feel like eating. So I dropped that. We have good dinner instead when mama's around. She is home most of the time anyway.

I just write. Get to the other side. Am I sleepy? Not yet. I can get the video later. I think it is out tomorrow. I think the season is about to finish. The attack to the prison will happen. That is what's expected.

That's where you get your twist. How? Someone dies. Something else happens. Like what? I don't know. If there was a nuclear holocaust, then you will have more zombies walking around. They eat animals as well.

And animals are immune to it? I think so. Otherwise, the virus would have spread faster. What is the cause? How do you cure it? I think the body will cure itself given the chance. But that is going to be boring on tv.

People want excitement. I want this blog writing to finish so I can go to the toilet. This font looks smaller already, but this is as far as I can go with this.

I will shut down the other computer soon as it is finished updating. Is there anything else I can do there? I am not sure, but right now, all is well. Just be in the moment.

This is why I write.