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going to rotorua




I am starting to enjoy soundcloud. I mostly listen to trance and electronic music. Now and then, I listen to rock. I am building up my likes and playlist from there. It's not mainstream. What I like about soundcloud is that I get to discover a different perspective on good music. There's a lot of flak in there, but over time, I find something good.

One of these days, I will have that playlist. In this moment, I sit and enjoy what is in there—and now I write. I think this inaanak of mine got married over the weekend. It looks different? Not mine, not how I would like it to be. I don't know. It's not my preference.

I think this soundcloud has dj shows. I guess I will listen to this and grow things from there. Do I want to go into that? I don't know. It's something that interests me. It could be related.

Later in the day, we will see jordan belfort movie. They see it for the actor and the movie, I want to see it for the story as to how he was able to grow his business and make almost a million a week.

It's there. It's simmering at the back of my head. I will get there eventually. Anyway, just write in the background listening to music. There is also this guy I am now following on spotify. He has the best of 2013 playlist. Thus far, it has been awesome. I wonder what genre those music are specifically. Like there is this umbrella genre, electronic music. There are several more under that—trance, etc. I want to see what flavor each of these are. Over time I go deeper into that.

I get tired of these eventually. That means I need to take a break. But while programming, these are awesome. There is also grooveshark. I can crank up the radio there. Does soundcloud have something like that? I think so. I think it's that trending thread. It's like radio, but it's based on likes from listeners. It's different from pandoras' algorithm. I get something from both. Not that one is better than the other.

It's that base beat that gets me. Where to get more of it? I don't know. I get there when I get there. I am more open to synchronicity these days. Like I was upset that this guy did not set things up as expected. After the initial response in my head, I labeled things as synchronicity. That some things happen and there's something in it for me. All I need to do now is to see what it is. Always it's good for me, like a surprise present. It could be a physical gift—or mental, or spiritual. Still, it's a surprise and I am going into that with that attitude.





I explained this to my wife last night. I wonder if she got it. Anyway, this is page two. I went to bed early last night. I did not get my afternoon nap. I think I fell asleep for a few minutes. When I am on keto, I tend to have shorter naps. That's good. That means I get into my zone sooner.

It takes 24 hours to get into the zone when on keto. On the second day, I feel this buzz inside of me. It goes away when I eat carbs. Carbs is like a quick high. It doesn't last. When I am on keto-buzz, it's like that good feeling you get while having sex and not yet having an orgasm. Eating carbs feels like an orgasm. After that, I taper off. I think I like the keto-buzz more. It's there in the background. It's always there for me to dip in. all I have to do is to take a moment and go in.

only when I feel blah that I look for that orgasm. I am going to remind myself how to deal with tis. It's not always good to listen to streaming radio. Not all of the music presented I am going to like. It's that contrast. All of this are connected. I can always reference this to the four laws.

And that could be why I get something from the inside even if the local mind couldn't get it. Local mind is open, I call local mind = local self.

Local self couldn't get things sometimes, but local me is open to it knowing that higher me is there already. I am allowing this to simmer in and local me will get it down the road.

And this is why the rotorua thing is here. I don't know how things will turn out from here. All I need to know is that it's part of the synchronicity. If it's here, then there's nomething in it for me, even if it's only there to get me going down a certain path.

What can I make out of it? I don't know yet. Writing about it lets me explore the different avenues available. I gottoa go down the path to get what's there though. After I write, things are a bit more clear.

christmas morning rain




Listening to soundcloud. Amazing that the quality of the sound is. I don't have to use an equaliver, rather, it's as if I have an equalizer with this.

It's christmas morning and it's raining. Do I want to listen to this? Or do I go back to pandora? I might go back. It's that shuffle function. But then again, they play the same thing over and over again. That's what I don't like about it.

Why not turn off the music instead? I dreamed that I had something created the other night. This morning, I woke up with the idea that I had a better tool to grasp what I need to do. Is this on to something?

Wife is doing her workouts. She got up early. We are going to this community christmas party. Do I want to be a part of that? It's a family and friends thing for them. The kids might want to go there. It's the anonymity that I don't like. There are no real conversations going on. The sound is too much? Amazing that it can be that loud. How come soundcloud has this good quality when the others don't have it?

Is it the tech? I am sure you can reverse engineer that. Daughter raiderz is now up. I think she liked the headphones we got for her. I don't really want to go to that christmas party. I would rather do my own thing. But since it's here, that's synchronicity for me. This is creation/higher self telling me to go try this path.

It's not a block. It's the idea that I consider something else. So I go. If you figure this out, the idea behind this, you will know and understand how to work with me. And I allow it. Is this something I want to listen to? I think if you had a party, you can listen to this. But then again, you will need to do a lot of filtering to make it work.





If kids want to see it, then so be it. Is there something else that I want to listen to? The thing about indieshuffle, there are not much mainstream music. I go there when I want to listen to something different and is already filtered by humans. That filtered by humans thing is quite useful for me.

This time, I am saving these music streaming sites to the cloud so I can go back to them in the future. Is that how you travel? I just amped the volume. The sound with this site is pretty ok. It's not as loud, but it's well moderated. People want their own thing. If you can support that, then the people will support you. If the current system is going to implode, what is going to replace it? Do I have to create that? We shall see. Car is going to be serviced on the 27th. We will see how things will go from there.

Wife has started planning the trip with ste. That's a good three letter name I heard last night. It got boring here and there. Why did I choose to zoom out? I want better conversations. It was good to do aikido there. I think I have enough time writing. I am way past that ten thousand hours practice time.

Where is this going? Nowhere. I have no expectations on this artistic expression of mine other than to enjoy the practice. I just remembered phimco days. That was me growing up. And it's now behind me. If I were management, how do I change things? How do I motivate people?

Do that six to one ratio. Everything else goes into dividends that is shared with everyone. I think that is a good thing there. It's more than enough. And if you go something else.. I don't like this music. Go do something else.

That is what the radio is for. It's new and indie. No issues with copyright there. It is only those who see it shallow will think that copyright is going to work there. As we can see now, it doesn't really work. Maybe I can go there now. I am tired of c++. I need a diversion. This is the diversion I seek.

Or maybe I can do something else. I just write. Most of the kids are still sleeping, or staying in their room. Third daughter has issues there. Do I want to listen to this? I don't know.

Do something else. Realize that music is only a reflection this time. It is you that will decide all this. Is there any good movies coming up? Glad that there are no christmas pinoy movie festivals here. They play that same movie here.

If I were at the helm, how do I turn things around? You already know them. You will know when you get there. Will I get a shot at public office? If I say so, then it will be so. But is that alignment for me? I don't know. Be open. You will find it.

sunday morning showers




My wife puts a lot of effort into her workouts. I admire that. I saw this video about the mayor binay incident. Neighbor has a new cars. This is the second one this month. Amazing. I feel envious.

It's spitting outside. I do no laundry. Maybe tomorrow. I found this channel on youtube where the channel owner apparently has good taste. I bookmarked it and will see how things go in the coming weeks. First song off the recent playlist sounds good. It's chill music. I like it. It's not my usual cup of tea, but it's good. I have senheiser headphones. I am open to good music.

Senheisers—i'm still looking into this. I like the sony pods I had before. It's still there. This one, the senheiser, doesn't have that 'separation' thing. Maybe because the pods go deeper into my ear that it sounds better. I don't know. The senheisers are here so I use it. It's not that bad. I can get used to it. There is a bit of a disappointment, but maybe it's something that I am not familiar with. I'll learn more about it in the coming days.

We got three headphones the other day. The other two are christmas gifts for our kids. I need to get christmas gifts for the wife and kids. It's a sunday. I can do that on tuesday. I will change my contact lens tomorrow. I'll be riding my bike later to go to a friend's house.

I am upset, choosing to get upset with the mayor issue. That's fine. And then there is the arnold video and I love it. Why can't they be like that. If leadership is going to the dogs, man, it's sad that that country has to go through that. Will this affect that leader's candidacy? I hope so. Who else is there?

There is bayani. I wonder how he lost? He did a great job there. I would give my life for that? Maybe in a different dimension. At the moment, I would rather walk away. That music don't sound good there and I moved it forward. This is chill music here. It's good to listen to something different.





Pandora, with its algorithm, is not that effective for me to find new music. I am all for new music. People are into that. How to do this then? Purchases are a good indicator too. Maybe there is a function on youtube for this? There should be. With google behind them, it's disappointing that they were not able to improve on youtube. They should do a shakeup there. How come no one else is picking up the pace? Like, if I were the competition, I will introduce changes that will wake everything up—much like what apple did.

This is how you can get in to this market. You disrupt everything. You offer an advantage to your market that is clearly for them. You support the all and they will support you back. No expectations. Only do it because it interests you.

I found this youtube streamer but I lost the link. That means I don't need it. Move forward to the next one. Next time, bookmark them to the cloud so I will know where to find them next. I feel like I overslept this time. Do I want to keep to this music? There are other sites that offer new music. Should I go there?

I just want something in my ears. Is that addicted? That lady on kettlebells has hot torso. I like that part. She must look good naked. She's not so muscular, but her torso, that part from the abs going to the hips, is awesome. I don't know what that is called, but I think it is called the torso.

Anyway, I am writing to finish these. I have teenagers in the house. I am getting old—shifting into something else. The physical is not the main thing here anymore. I don't know what it is. The local mind can't get a grasp for it, but together, it is understood.

My phone rang. I am halfway through this one page. This is the second page. That means I am almost done here. Wife and kids are going to church, then head off to the flea market. I like it there. It's cloudy with showers today. I wonder if things are going to improve later on.

I can hang out there, then when it's time to go, I can head over there. I can bring a towelette to freshen up when I get there. That be a good day working out. I will go back to that. There are a number of things to do around here. Do this and get to the other side. I will get it with regular practice.

That's how you get good at something, even programming. You practice everyday. More so when no one is looking. When it is not expected of you. I don't have much to offer other than I am committing to it. If you can't get that, then you are not fit to be my guide. Not teacher. There is no such thing as a teacher.

december summer here




I was able to fix the connection problem with mt4. I think it had something to do with the server. Tech support(chat) gave me some ip numbers and it worked. And I thought that either the broker was closed, or the fx market was off early for christmas.

Next time I know better. I tried a trade at market and it worked. It did not let me do a limit/stop order. I will test that later on. In the meantime, do this.

There was an article I found earlier. This guy traded 1500 into a million dollars in three years. He was trading penny stocks. He was a student of sykes. When I found out, the article lost a bit of credibility. It could be true, but it's also true that sykes is selling his system.

But anymay, trading penny stocks is as risky as trading fx. I would rather trade the fx market. It's more open althogh I am having a challenge with it right now. It's been a drought for some time now. I am not riding, then I am runnig. These past few days, I have been inside the house and in front of the cmoputer. I need to get out more often.

I can run in that field later after wife leaves for work. In the meantime, I write. I am making progress with learning c++. I am getting it. The first time I tried learning it, I must have been not patient enough. This time, the alternative is java/android. I would rather do c++. I think the future is embedded programming. You need a language that is closer to the metal. Java isn't it. That means android won't be around that long? It will be. It's this and that. I just don't like working with java. That might change, but for now, my interests tell me that c++ is the way to go.





The book I am using is learn c++ in 21 days. It is simple enough and is explained in layman's terms. I get it. They also give good and plenty of examples that I can do. The second book is still a basics, but covers different topics. I have videos in my library, but they make me sleepy. At least with a book, I can listen to music and it helps me to stay alert. I do a one hour session morning, afternoon and night. I am making good progress.

This time, I get object oriented programming. I also get pointers—at least the basics. I can do a basic program. It's the lookup that's painful, but I can do it. I will start exploring soon enough. I don't have to finish the whole thing.

And what about trading? Qt is a good framework to use. I can go down that path as well. That is a field of expertise I can look into. Things don't work immediadtely though. There are bits and pieces that are missing for me. But that's one path that I see from where I am.

I went to bed early last night. I don't do things until midnight anymore. It must be that redshift app in the pc. It changes color when it starts to get dark. This helps me to get sleepy after ten. And that's good. Wife comes home early now. Next stop is christmas break.

She is going to work with my second daughter. She is going there to meet some friends—my daughter. Three stay at home and do their thing. I can go out and run later. No need to go fast. Just do my thing. I realize that I am overweight. This is the path I am on. I don't get how things work when I think about it. I instinctively know though, that it works by reflection. And that's what local mind has a hard time wrapping itself in.





and that's ok. This is part of the process. Only do this and get to the other side. I can go into ea testing. There is something there. I think I can trade this on dead hours. This is something that I will look into.

It is wednesday. Time flies so fast. Soon it's going to be the weekend. Wife is up. She will work out. That will keep me company as I write. This is my morning sessions. I have lots of images to post on me blog. So much that I created a facebook page to post the overflow. I post there twice a day.

There's so much on the internet. How to spread them? I don't know how to monetize them. I can create a blog and take it from there. Create one in node. Then post the images where? Imgur. That one is free.

I think I can do that. That will keep me on the learning side of things. What else is there for me? I can make into like pinterest. That too is a learning angle for me. Then add angularjs.

That also is a good path for me. I can monetize them. Seo is ok, but there are things I can do to make things better. I can get traffic through that page. Then take things from there.

saturday grocery later




Daughter's friend is sleeping over. She invites herself over. That's fine with me. I like her attitude, but when she's here, I remember how annoying having five kids in the house can be—specially now that they are teenagers.

I guess it's not them that's annoying, but that I am choosing to be annoyed. There's a difference there. They are darlings each of them. I have definitions that put conditions on how I respond. This affects my experience and how I respond to things.

Maybe this is why she is in this picture. She is here to show me this. I am now thankful.

I think this is what my process is about. Spotify lets me play them playlist. Now I need to find a way how to shuffle them. I think I need to create my own, then shuffle them together much like what they do on pandora. If this is so, why move to spotify? I already have this feature on pandora?

It's to get more money from others. If they, spotify can show that they have more eyeballs, then the money will come in. I think that there is nothing special about what that other wine guy did. He found a good wave and rode it. Now he is disappearing from the radar. His last name is hard to remember. I think his first name is gary.

He tried to extend things, but there was a bit of anxiety in it. It doesn't reflect well. This is how things are. I am still with c++. there is qt. But the path is not quite set considering that it's been around for years. I can't find a good tutorial. Maybe lynda.com has something on it?

Or tutsplus. I looked around, but the tech all points to the web. Maybe this is why I am still with c++, it's because everyone else is focused on the web. I think that it's mobile + native that's going to work here. The device has limited resources. If you can create a web browser app with qt, and all content goes through that, and then go native when not connected—there is something about it.





I miss creating stuff. When did I create stuff? I do that all the time. I do create things with my morning pages. I write every morning whenever I can. There's plenty of beautiful pictures on the internet. How do I use that?

No need to work for money. As it is, when I am in the right angle, I see that. I don't have to define things the way they do. It's a different world I like in and the definitions from the old world no longer apply.

When I find myself not in the light, then things get confused. Co-fused is something to it. I don't have to go there. I know where it is I am going. I think she leaves later in the day. Her dad picks her up. He's a nice guy. She said her laptop is messed up. I can fix it, look it up and if need be, reinstall os. But the parents have to give permission for that as I don't have it. It's not mine.

It's a toshiba. I sued to think that that brand is better. I guess dan has someone else for tech support these days. Do I want to go there? I have skype, but they have issues with security. That's why I don't have it on my phone. I can use it, but who else is using it?

I like hangouts better. I can send sms with that, and if need be, make calls with it as well. Going back to odesk, I can use that, or whatever else the client needs using. I think also that people are looking for that app to sex people up.

I think that was the appeal with wechat. Badoo is more spammy. I don't think they want to be the community's choice for hookups. You don't want to control it. Doing so only makes people go away.

How do you do it then? Build the campfire, then let the community build itself around it. Support the people and the people will support you. Not a lot of clients get that. All they want is to be the next big thing on the internet. That is why facebook made it. Also google. They made the campfire, people found it and decided to stay.

Badoo built a campfire, but they want to make money out of it. It's like you can watch from afar, but to sit close to the fire, you have to pay. In the meantime, someone else is building a better fire and supporting the community.

This is why reddit is so successful. That's what you want to do. Support the people with your app and the people will support your app. That's it. That's all you have to do. Don't worry about the money. It will come from investors.

So how do I go from here? This is the last paragraph. Post this, then get on with my day. Wife came home late last night. I was already sleeping.

last day school




I like spotify but there's a few things about it that makes me choose pandora instead. First, streaming. There are times when music streaming gets choppy. Considering that our broadband connection is fast enough and steady, I don't think it has anything to do with our connection. Pandora's stream doesn't, never been choppy like that. Youtube streams without a glitch. When I listen to spotify and music starts getting choppy, I am outa there.

Second issue is, no shuffle. It gets boring listening to one genre at a time. I can create my own station, or listen to someone else's station, but that's not mine. I don't know what to expect with that. I will look into that, but soon as I get the chops, I move to a different station.

Third, I forgot. No need to dwell on that but I am sure there's a third issue with spotify. I have mentionde choppy streams. I think that's one trouble enough already with spotify.

Pandora is pretty ok, but they are starting to give me repeats. I'm not sure if there's any streaming music sites out there but I am on thelookout for this. I get hese headaches latesy.

Yesterday, there was also the dizzyness. I wonder what it is. I get concerned about it. That tells me the definitions I have about these things. What can I do about it?




Last day of school for the kids in westlake. The other two ends on friday. They maximize these things. The kids are growing up fast. It's going to shift again. I have more time for myself, but still I am tied to the house. I guess this is my job now. And I am doing a good work with it. No need to want to be a big shot corporate sob. It's not me anymore. I don't go there. I would rather be a tech startup. That's where my interests are these days.

I don't know where this is going, but as long as it's interesting enough, I am right there. Atm, it's all about mobile apps. I am learning native. I already am familiar with mobile web. Javascript is a deeper subject and I already have a grasp on it. So I am moving on now and c++ is interesting. I am surprised that I am getting it.

It is getting warm again. I just removed my jacket. I continue writing. When I get back later, I am to get ready for my dauoghter's prize giving ceremony. She is getting an award. She works hard at school. I am thinking of stopping by burger king later on and get her something. I will check my account balance later on.

And what else is there? I think the issue is about something else. When she gets tantrums, it's not about the privacy or getting her own room. I think it has to do with the guilt. That's not good about the church. They plant that in your head. This way, you are going to keep going back to them.

Why do they do that. If they were so powerful, why would they want the control? It's the contrast. This is here to show me the difference between both realities. I have a choice here. Be in the light, or get in religion. I already made that choice a long time ago. This is just traces of the past to show me the contrast.

I have never been at peace like this. It is based onmy own criteria than someone else's. This is what my self is about . No more religion. I never carry someone else's cross anymore. Jesus chose that. Why should I choose to carry his cross for hime.

If it works for them, then so be it. My choice acts as contrast for them. This to show that they too, have a choice. I don't have to go there. I am a man of peace. I don't hink I am an evil person because I don't have religion like them. It's too much a burdento carry. I am moving forward now. No need to write about it.

I have too many baggages to carry myself. Most of the time, it has to do with someone else's baggage. When I am out of the light, I realize it with the way I feel. If it's not something that feels good, I check in on the definitions atd thoughts I am having. Then I go into the light.

This is my daily practice. This is where you will find me. This is where things expand from. How do I find that? See the expansion? Only that I take a moment to be in the present. When I do that, then I see the definitions and all that. There is no outside. The reflection shows me and I make adjustments if needed.

Why am I writing about this? It's what is in my head right now. I pick up daughter from friend's house later on. I also go meet the wife someplace else. She moves to different work next year. That is good. It is exciting for her. I knew that she was going to get that job because she was excited about it. Things are different with her.

astral gemma estrada




I'm done with my morning chores. Son isn't going to school today. I woke up from a dream about gemma estrada. She was someone from my past-now. I still wonder what happened there. I let her go.

Now what. There is regret. How do you deal with that? Things happen for a reason. How does this memory serve me? Is it something I want or need to redefine? I feel like things are not happening—or that the reflection I get is not in alignment. How do you fix that?

Is there a hack for this? What if there isn't? Then I will live with it and just be ok with it. I may not know what it means, but yes I do. How come I don't get what I want most? How come the higher self knows, but local self will only find out in hindsight?

How is this connected to the expectation? I have kids. I could have kids with her too. Sometimes I see the society I grew up in and wonder how that serves me. It would still serve me, and I feeling better about it, if I got what I wanted. How is that possible?

Things turned out well overall, but in the end, I fell like it fell apart. What wal wrong there?it wasn't going to last forever. I should have let go long before it fell apart. Was it something that excited me? It was interesting. I was in the light. Maybe...i still don't get it really.

I like how this letter char I looks like. It is a popular font. I see it all the time. But maybe it's because it is in my config files. So be it then. Only that I write. It's a friday. I woke up thinking ti was a saturday. But it istomorrow. Wife is goitg to work tomorrow. I fell asleep immediately last night.

There was no sex this time as wife has her periiod. I don't really need it, but the intimacy is great. Maybe this is what it's all about.

Why not get what you want? Maybe there is somethig there. The reason that you don't know what you want or that it's not good for you doesn't cut it for me.

I think it's because it's the conditions that you have. You think, rather I have this idea that if I got what I wanted, then I would be happy. That if I got what I wanted, I would be in the light.

This is here to show me that it is the other way around. That I can be happy without getting what I want. That if I were to just be in the light, then I will get something else that is greater than what I originally wanted. Ith is a reflection.

I think that's the lesson there. That if I wanted something, I match that vibration. Even if I don't get that, I have already that vibration and that I don't need it anymore. It as an ivnvitation to be in the light. That you do not have to have the physical to get to being.

I could have learned that in the physical? Not really. You'd be after the physical, the outer illusion rather than being on the inside. I think that is how it is.

Where di d that comef rom? This is what writing is about. I was able to connect tehre. It doesn't come from me. If you have that idea, then it is a limited resource. But if you were to connect to all that is and not be from just you, then you have all of creatio to source from.

This is what to me is what open source is about. It's not about mine or yours. It is all connected. Be that way and it will be that way. No need to change what is on the outside. Only that you be without conditinos. Thisi s what my writing is about. No need ta make it fancy. Just write and get to the other side.

North korea is so clean. Is it a better society? I think it has to do with the fact that—i just went around in circles there. Rather than getting to the point. Now I lost what I was about to say.

I dreamed that I left my wife for gemma. What does that mean? That I went, that I chose to be in the light no mattter what. I did not have sex with her because that was in the outer world. That was in the illusion, the reflection.

What if I chose to be in the light? How do yo udo that in your dream? You wanted to have something on the outside. But it's inmy dream. In tehre, there is no outside.

How do you have sex with someone in your dream? I get to that sexy parts, but nothing happens. I wake up. Or maybe I think that nothing happened. The local mind can't get what is happening on that level.