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post mortem thing

Do more with less. This seems to be a part of my process or path. What am I getting out of it? I don't really need much to get in the light. I can choose to be in the light without much of anything. When I see the contrast, I can let go, or look into the source cod. One other option is to use up the energy. This is what I get out of it.




Does it serve me? I think so. There be times when I, the local mind don't get it, but I can choose to allow it to be so. No need to make it otherwise. And what do I get out of that? Idon't know at times. All I know is that if it's here, then there is something there for me. The local mind sometimes can't get why it is so, but understands that there's a reason for it.

I have been woozy since last night. It's all the junk I had yesterday. I put a reason in it that serves me. It's that fast going into the next day. I did not have anything for dinner other than coffee and diet soday. I can do without the diet soda, but it was there. I feel like there be gaps in my process.

I like the cherno project for java programming. It's starting to make sense. It's like c++ but with memory management built in. yes. It is like so. But there's still a big gap in there. Why the need for that? I do java to get into android programming. That seems, feels like something I can enjoy doing. Hacking into my phone and learning how to get things done.

Do I need a job for that? Not necessarily. I can get gigs here and there. That seems interesting enough for me. That's where I am headed. I can't get why people I know can't get into that when they need jobs? Like my bro and some people I know. But that's life. And when they retire, there is that nagging feeling that it's going to run out.




And I have that now? I think so. Then use the energy. What can I do here to get in the light. Let go. Be at peace. That is ultimately where you want to go anyway. You don't have tohave the outside reflection. You don't have to have the toys that go with it. Be in the light and the toys have a better chance of coming. Not that you need them, but that if it's relevant for you, then you will be having that experience.

I am feeling woozy. What now? This is day on. It's one year of this. Tonight is a test? It's contrast. I don't have to fight iti. I only choose which light to get into. I understand the challenge. I would rather label it as contrast. You need contrast for the reflection. It...they go together. You can't have one without the other.

Sometimes it may seem like the other, contrast is not there. It's like you have all dark without light, but light is there, you just can't see it then. And that's the nature of my experience. To see the contrast. It is this is that.

And there is so much to learn. I don't think it will end. It's expanding. You can go to a different level, but the level is already there, you just don't see it. There is so much to explore. And I can let go of all if I choose to. And it's still part of the whole.




I have the kids' lunch in the oven cooling off. When I finish writing I can move that out, then start wrapping them. One child is staying home. She is done with school. I can call the uniform shop and see if they are open today. I can go over and get the uniform.

I can bring along the existing uniforms to get their sizes right. I don't want to have to go out, but if this is the process, then so be it. Do I have to run? That is what I look forward to. I have one more page I am dizzy. I need water? Maybe this is something else. I took my bp last time and it was something else.

How to use this then? Am I scared of that word? Why? It was an unpleasant experience. It's the label I have. I see. It's like I have to deal with a teacher with a limited or different perspective. And this is why I don't like school. They don't get it. They got carried away with the labels.

You don't teach. The students learn. They are not even students. They too can teach. It's just that they believed in the label and never seem to question anything about it. And this is where the path goes. You can go deep into the forrest and get the experience. And that is the learning process as well.




And how do you get out of the forrest? You choose it. Or you don't have to get out of the forrest. Maybe the forret will change. Maybe it shifts into something else. Maybe that is so.

Why is wife up early? And what was that vibe about? It's probably gmail sending stuff. I have gone forward from here. No need to deal with the past. It's an illusion. Everything is here and now. I can look under the hood when I am here and now. Sometimes it's hard to work with the reflection. You think that the reflection is reality. It's not.

What then is real? Your experience of it is real. How do you grasp that? Go inside. See the awareness. That is the one having the experience. And how do you connect that with reality. I don't know. Is she going to workout? I think so. She is getting her cup of water. She is going for the workout. I can get a video of that and put it in plex.

That way, you don't have to get the dvd. I can look into that. Maybe get that as a gift for her out of nowhere. She has been losing weight. She runs everyday. I don't think she is running today.