I am off to resign from that job. It's not me anymore. Synchronicity is telling me it's time to move on. Wife don't, won't get it. I allow that. This is part of my path, contrast. So be it. I trust the synchronicity. It's not that I am in control but the paradox is, with vulnerability comes strength.
I don't have to control anything. Everything falls into place by reflection. And I trust this. I know this. It's part of my path. I was relieved that I was getting fired. It's just that I have too much baggage from other people to process that I felt neg about it.
But it's behind me now. I get home sometime mid day and I can resume my play. And this is what it's going to be. I don't know how things will turn out. This is where I am. No need to know how things will turn out. This is where I am and this is what the path opened up to.
And what's next? There's plenty of resources out there to get to that level. I am following that path to see where things lead to. I was able to spot a leak and played differently. If this works at these levels where it's cheap to call, I can use this to get to the levels I am and make good at that.
And this is where I am. I only want her to be happy. I allow her to be in her choice and consequence. This is the contrast I have. I trust that she is getting something good out of it. I can't teach her the ways. She has to be in the same frequency to get it.
She knows where my light is. She only has to make a choice to go there and things will line up for her as well. What's next here for me? I don't know yet. Only that I do this and see what happens on the other side. And I don't know what's going to happen next.
It may seem stupid, but it won't make sense for me to keep doing something that is not me. I'd rather play poker staked than to work eight hours at something I do not enjoy. Besides, working for companies like that where humans are just units of production—that's not me anymore.
Some people get that. I don't. I don't have to fight anything anymore. Only that I be in my light and see where this path leads to. Where to get staked? I don't know yet. It's going to get there eventually. I don't see time frames as I drop expectations when I get them.
I leave at nine. I start at ten something I think. I have time for that. It is ten or something. I don't have to go there. Just get to the other side and see what happens here. And I would have gone on, but my higher self is saying, it's time to move on. And that's where I am going now.
I don't know what's next. I follow the light. I don't know how things will turn out. I could go there or here. For now this is where I am. And I can get a stake later on. It don't have to be a grand one. Only that I do this. How to get that image there?
I don't know yet. I can get my old files from them threads that I replied to looking for stake. That will get me to the other side. And what else is there? I don't know. There are a lot of things that I don't know and it's ok to not know. That is part of the process. That much I know to be true.
And I don't think I want to talk to wife. She will revert back to the dark. But I am not going to lie to her as well. I do what I do and get to the other side. This is where I am right now. I can stay there and do that thing. Or just do what's easy if required. I am not there anymore.
And I had to take a day off yesterday. Not to realign myself to get ready for work. It's more to take time off and see where the path goes. And this I sthe path for me. Hy keep saynig that? It's there for a reson. I can write. No need to write for someone else. Do I want a copywriter job?
I am laready at page theree? That is some fast writing. Plenty of downloads happening in my head. When I sleep I meet people and they seem to assist me where I need to go. And I am starting to feel good about myself again. That's important. No need to classify this as a neg. only what I say it is is what I get back.
No need to be someone else as well. This is who I am. It's different out there and things have started to shift. Things are different now. And I write. I do this to get to my other side. Things will come. So how do you play with variance?
Will this work in higher stakes? Play two poker sites? Will there be enough juice in my computer to do so? I think so. I can have them run at the same time and play more that way. I can do twenty tables at ten each site. That will be a good idea there? I think so. I compare and test later. Done.