now what how?

Take out the bloat. This is what I do now. I can create one for and another one in The outpull is for dm while the first is for dev play. I have plenty to play with now. That thing is coming up. Do you need that anyway?

Shit. What now? Let it go. You can go with heroku? Is there an alternative here? Do upwork. Plenty of that. I think that part there is going to get you to the other side.

Why not just angular and javascript? It's not entirely front end but it's going to work anyway, doesn't it? I can go that way, can't I? Why learn php frameworks? It's that part that is my blind side. I can go this way or that anyway as well. Those in school are learning that. I got a bite with angular before but I stopped going that way.

Am I avoiding things? I can go nodejs and angular all the way. Am I limiting myself here. I am low budget now. I can still go to these things but there's that anxiety. How did I get here? It has something to do with the coices I made. It has something to do with how I choose to think. It boils down to that. Some of it are unconscious. Now that I am aware of it, it's not a patern but a choice. Why am I choosing to think that way?

At least I am awake. I see that now. It's time to move forward. What's next then? I have meetups coming up. What do these people need? Why cater to them? If I were to work with startups, what frameworks are they using? Does it matter which stack I use? I have node. I can take on a node framework? I think so. Why not php? It's all the same isn't it?

I can use angular with php but that feels like extra layer when you can use php itself. Why learn javascript at all? There be a number of gigs for that as angular but you will have to learn other things. I can pick up all the angular I need in a day. After that, I am using the api guide and google all the time. Why not then? Why ask all these compsci questions in the interview when it's evident that you are going to use google as well?

They want to see how you think. Then it's how you use the knowledge that's different. It's also the ego? I don't know. I am in panic mode? Not yet. But I am anxious about my situation. How did I get here? I did not apply to enough jobs? Is it helping that I am sending out my application resume that way.

I think you see the point here. I used wordpress there and I did not finish the job. I think you were working with a noob there but you can do better next time. At least I got it right and only need to get going this way and that. What's next here?

I don't think I showered yesterday. It's a weekend. We have hackathon on the 21st. That's three weeks from today. I'll be up and running by that time. That would be like ten off the charts. Let's do that. I am riding with my son today. He'll get that all. I can do this for now. What else is there? I am moving the laundry downstairs. Let's do that for today. Is there something that's available? I can go check that out today. I can ask for assistance. Let's go there now.

This is next page situation. I write more when I need or I am going a path. Not that I need. Exploring a path is more apt than needing something. It puts me in the active verb. Is that necessary? I think it is here to see how I think about the situation. I am really exploring where this is headed. I do this and get in my light. Not that I need it, but it's there when it's relevant. I have a lot of things in my head. So I am taking things away into its bare essentials?

I think this is the path. So be it then. I am going to miss them, but I am gaining something else instead. Like what? The next dimension is more exciting. It's like this and that. How am I going to be in business this way? You see the focus there? Why not build your own web app instead of learning to get employed? You have all this in place anyway. Take it from here and see where this goes. Like what?

I don't know. But you have the energy now. Follow that lead and see where this goes. You don't have to know everything. It's all in there. You already have everything. You don't even have to learn all that. You will know what is relevant—no more, no less. And it comes at the most perfect time, when you need it.

This is how everything is connected for you. Why is this here? How is this here is a better question. This puts you in the driver's seat. You created this instead of someone else or something else is moving you. There is a difference there, yes? It feels better that way as well. You don't really need to know why. You get it when you get it, nda it's subjective. The why may work this time, but not the nex.t. better to know how. It's more objective that way.

How to change this? Reverse engineer how you got there. That awy, you are different and change is constant so you get a different path. Wife is getting up soon. Do I go in there with her? Yes.