that's your job

I too, get anxiety attacks. When I am deep into learning, there be times that it's coming from a negative frequency than pure interest and curiosty. It's like I need to be this to be that. I had to stop for a moment there and finish the laundry.

Is it good for me to be watching this friend going through a nervous breakdown? I am recovering from depression myself. Every now and then, I feel anxious myself. I feel like i've lost momentum with what I was building.

If that's how you want to define it then that's the effect you get. This is opportunity for you to reframe everything. It's up to you to choose how to respond to this situation. You are in the light. Not that you are better or worse, only that you are different.

He keeps going in and out of the room here. He seems to start at a thought, trail off then tangent off to something else. It's like an extreme version of a different me. This is contrast and reflection for me. How do I gain from this. If you are in that frequency, how will you respond differently?

Get in the light more often. Take a deep breath. I don't have a partner like that but mine is, seems to be supportive enough. She gets her own tantrums but I am comfortable with mine. Am I blaming someone else for this? Am I fit to write? I think so. I am writing.

Then what? I am putting this on paper so I have something to do. I told wife that I went through a period of depression. Is it that? It felt like it. I was looking for google depression every now and then. I think bashar's definition worked well for me. I am not fighting it, rather I am using up the energy.

When I feel anxiety attacks coming up, I take a moment and see where I am. I look into my definitions. This helps a lot. Often, the same emotions and definitons come up. This is opportunity for me to see how far away I have moved away from those and move into something that I prefer.

With my friend's situation, it showed me that ...he keeps coming back and forth to get attention. Should I stop writing, then continue later? I can choose to do that but I am not really doing anything. The tv is off. What else can we do here? I have other stuff to do. Let's do something else here. Last time they were here, he was zonkers already.

I can go there and use that energy. It don't matter. It seems that way. I'll stop writing now then grab something to eat. I'll be doing the dishes now.