writing this way

New year's day. It has been raining since past midnight last night and we are still in camp. The sides of our tent are wet on the inside. I am surprised that they kept us dry (almost) all through the night. I woke up after midnight and did not get back to sleep until after 3.

what happened? The wind on the tent was making too much noise. Rain on the tarp was noisy. It felt like all that was driving me crazy. So much negative energy was coming up through me and I was overwhelmed. I feel like all I can do was sit in the light and let allow it all to just be.

What happens now? I do what I think is right for everyone concerned. Wife said off-hand yesterday that I never make big decisions. In a way, that was a compliment. I somhew too that negatively. I would have let that go through but I was in negative energy and responded that way.

It's not that I was not making big decisions. It's that when I do make decisions that are not aligned with her definitions, we have a fight over it. I have been more positive with her definitions. I see it that she does things that she thinks is right, although those definitions are a bit limited.

It is based on her religious beliefs and definitions. I am not letting myself be limited by all that. I am hungry. I can pack up while they make ready for breakfast. I can choose to join them for breakfast, or have something on the way.

Someone is up. I think it's eldest daughter. They can and will come to the car, but maybe it's dry in their tent, marm as well. So be it. We go home today. No more of this for the rest of the year. I don't like the way she plans things. I did come along to be with the kids. That lady is hot.

Will I be able to get one of those? Why not? See the definitions there? I see that too. Somone is out of the tent. She might want to go to toilet? I don't know. What is that. She is so organized and responsible. I am glad with how she turned out. Proud has something to do with ego. I am proud but not that I am responsible for how she grew up.

There's like moisture on the surface of everything. This is the last day at camp. Tomorrow we go home. This is also the last day of the year. I am no longer that person who indulges, fills himself with carbs.

Several times this week, I had the opportunity to eat carbs. It would have been reasonable(?) since we are away and low carb meals are hard to find, but I stuck with it. I can recharge this laptop at night or when the kitchen is empty.

I am sure an opportunity will open up where I can charge these some other place in the meantime, I will use this. The wife and kids are still sleeping. There is a loud voice over those bushes. Plenty of new people around here.

We are all learning as we go along. This is an opportunity to drain these batterise. I can recharge later. I think tht is one person on the phone. These folks with the nice toys own their business. If they were employees, they'd have that grind look on their face.

I fed the birds with old bread. The ducks were picky about it. They left after a few bites. They must have better choice around here. What will interest you moving forward? Pentesting is interesting. Writing? Maybe so. But that has so much expectations tied to it.

Maybe it is your expectations. Why not try something else instead. Like what? I don't know yet. Creating my own toys. Trading and machine learning. Those are two things that I enjoy as well. It's in your phone. Look there and see where you are headed.

Where do I post these? Keep it in here and see how things go. Until tomorrow, you won't be able to do anything about it. Maybe the neighbors went on vacation too. There isn't a lot of indians here. Why is that. Even when we were in rotorua, there were not a lot in there.

It's the minimum essentials maybe. I wouldn't choose this unless I chose it. Maybe they have a different path. Their interests are different. If it were me, i'd stay near the city. We could have gone out for buffet or something. Leave it as is and see where this is going.

Then what? Keep to your interests. It's all connected. This is my definition. It's what the cpu is running. I think. I get negative feedback and I can look into source code. I slept better last nigth. I did wake up some time after four, but I was able to go back to sleep.

There's pain in my shoulder from last nigth's sleep. Wife is still sleeping. We couldn't have sex around here as she has to pee and it's a long walk to the camp toilet. We'll catch up when we get home. That's the first thing we do in fact.

I have package coming next week. It's the laptop bag which is a backpack. I also have iron skillet for the wife plus a chef knife. The iron skillet is to season to show her what a true non-stick pan is. I am also going to start making donuts. I have seen a recipe where you can fry them.

I think I bookmarked them last time. It's easy to find one on the internet anyway. Follow your path. Be in your light and you will see the reflection all around you. It don't matter where you think it's headed. Be open to synchronicity. It's not about having all the toys. It's that state of being.

That you who has all the toys, did not have the state of being that you have now. I can charge the phone again after I move some of my bashar stuff into this. In the meantime, get aligned and see how things go. I can stop writing soon as I finish two pages.

What happens next. I could have grown my own club in here if I chose to. But that has too much conflict in it. Do something else in the meantime. For now, only do this. Would it have been fun. I don't know. I'd make friends. Wife might not be happy with it altogether.

For now, this is where I am. Stick with this and it leads to you. It shows your reflection. You can expand from there. It's all here and now. What you do is to be more aware of your frequency so you will see.

Is this me writing this way? Maybe I can write a different way. I can do that. These people look nice anyway. It's this and that. You always have a choice. That is a natural red head. Man. I am getting old. What to do now?

I had a great time with the wife and kids. I was that person that I chose to be. Everything was perfect. Contrast was there as feedback. I am using that now.

don't get that

Boxing day today. Wife went to work. She thinks that she has to, but that's her source code. There is motivation for her to do so. It's not my baggage. I am not going to change her. It's up to her if she sees the example or not.

What's in it for me? I see contrast. I have feedback. This is not how I prefer. I prefer otherwise. Programming is almost there. Writing is in that league. At times I don't feel like doing anything. That's when I take a break. There is jiro sushi. When it is relevant, it slides down easy. I guess it's not relevant for me at this time.

I see the contrast, use that energy. I don't have to be there. I have access to that energy anyway. This is my path. I don't have to be like anyone else. I don't have to push away nor pull int. this is where the energy is.

Christmas yesterday was good. I got tired at nigth. I was in negative energy. It's not that she makes me wait. I have that choice. I can put that cookie in my mouth. It's my choice if I want to go there or not. It's my opportunity. Which path do I choose?

This is how it's all connected. I see the contrast and I have choice. It's an opportunity to be who I prefer to be. It starts from the inside. Once you let the outside lead, you are lost in the illusion. It's all you anyway.

I can't grasp how it's inside out. How can you tell? It's the experience that's inside. How come it's physical? You experience it that way. Experience is connected to who I am? Without experience, are you who you say you are? Then you experience everything then.

I sense the connection. It's my brain that can't define it. That's ok. I can experience it my way anyway. Today is boxing day. I don't have to go out. I can choose to be in this light and everything falls into place. I see the relfection anyway. I can choose to go through all that traffic and parking problem. Or not.

These are both legal choices for me. Go this way or that. There is a sparrow in the house. These are the cleaners somewhat. It's like rats. They are not dirty. They just go to places we think are dirty. There is no dirt? Why is that bird still in here? I think it wants to stay here.

Them my pets? Not pets. More like extensions. Not mine though. They are their own awareness. It's the experience of each other that we share. How is that? The bird sees me and is aware of me. Bird experience this situation. I have a different perspective of the experience. This is how it's connected.

How to experience what he it experiences? Go there. The trash is collected today. That's their experience. You can choose to fight it. Is that bottles for the blue bin? I think so. The other one was here earlier. There's also the boxes collector. These three come along each week in different regions.

That too is experience. These people downstairs know a lot of people. That is good networking. You are in that situation. When you venture out, you get your own connection as well. How come they know a lot of people? That they come here to see him says a lot about the person. Who is he?

I don't know. Keep a note of who he is. It's somewhat connected that way. It's surprising that they come see him. What's different here? I don't know. Do you want to go there? Maybe so. I have plenty trash here still. You get rid of them move them out one percent.

For now, I am done putting them out. Next step is to get another trash bag. In the meantime, I do something else. Like what? Write. Finish writing. The daughter will finish watching starwars today. When we get back from road trip we go see the other one.

I don't know why she behaves that way. It's her choice anyway. So be it. I don't have to change that. It's her experience. I am in this awareness as well. It's that who you are? Maybe so. Without the awareness, is there the experience? It can go inwards. You let go of the local and go in to a different dimension. That's what my parents went to?

Maybe so. I think so. I am made aware of this idea. Then it is so. This is communication. Want another coffee? I can go out for a ride today. I don't have to push anything. I can go to flea market tomorrow. Kids want to go there anyway. What do we do in there? I don't know yet. It's here so I stick with this for now.

Where do I park? I don't know yet. In the meantime, this is where I am. I am going to teach daughter how to drive. I teach her the way I would have wanted to learn. Wife don't get that.

side with this

The movie steve jobs with ashton kutcher was boring. I think the focs are still better. It got slow somewhere in the middle. Maybe I was thinking or looking for a more exciting story. Docs are boring but I love watching them instead. So it's not about the hyped up story.

I have another one in the movie folder. I might go see that tonight. Wife gets home late tonight. Today is her last day of work for the year. I still don't know, or not sure about what it is I want to do. Try this--does it work? It did. Replace dashes and make sure you untick both boxes.

The triple dots, I a not sure. When you do not separate them it works. I might give son twenty bucks. The courier messed up delivery this time. Is it because of the season? That is putting it on the outside. What are you getting out of it? Everything happens for a reason. This all happens for you. What is in the source code this time?

Not patience, but lining up wit the frequency no matter wwhat you think you see is on the outside. You have this already. I got tired of walking to that school. I should have done something else. Should I do another gig in there? I can call them up but I am done there. It's not getting me where I am.

What's next here? Do android, learn java--get to the other side/ no. match frequency. It's all here anyway. You learn one thing, learn everything. It's all connected anyway. You already know that. It's how it's connected that you are seeing. Then you connect. You put everything together. Once you realize how it's connected, you get the big picture.

I get that sometimes. Is there a delivery coming in today? I just want to get this over and done with. In the meantime, let's do something else here. There must be insurance for this. How do you get that? Claim that and move forward from here. I think they will need to study all that then.

I don't have much but the little I have, I give hundred percent. It's gotta be relevant though. That bim request was contrast for me. Bro was a bit close, but I guess I was saving for this little boy here. Should we get something local now? I can use that one if that ever comes in instead.

I think that makes sense. I can go check out the shops later. They might have that in stock. I am going that side anyway. I will bring this along so I have something to do while waiting? At least I have a choice in there. Like what then? Why not use it to time out yourself. What are the kids going to have?

They have aplenty. Wife is going to be home tomorrow and then they go out during the day. She leaves later in the afternoon though. Was her plans gone awry? I don't know. At least things are moving in the right direction for her.

Finish the udacity nanodegree then go fiverr. That is the path. Soon as you get enough in your portfolio, you go upwork, then go local clients. This is the path. It's exciting this way? I think so. It is a path. Everyone here has an idea for something anyway. I can even do game dev.

That sounds logical. Kids will ask their partent for a dollar game. I can do that. It's cheap anyway. You can find something in there that you can always improve on. I already have that with me anyway. Improve on that and see where it goes.

The next step is to get that inc for your business. That comes easy when you have cash flow coming in. you are building something this way. This is where the frequency is. You match that and you see the reflection. I see that. What happens next? Finish that gig then get going.

The thing is, you need internet to compile gradle. Is there a way to do that local? I think so. See ant. It worked that way before. But google is no longer using it. The java community is still into that. When not online, you do java instead and improve on that.

I see htat. It's time to get cracking? I think so. You don't need what is on the outside. Be that channel and you will see everything else. It's that simple. You don't have to be like someone else. Write you r own story. Be the character in your story.

You don't even need a blog for that. This here is your blog. There's a lot of fluff in here but you can get to the other side with this. You know how things work anyway. It worked for you in the past. Let's get this cracking here.

What are the kids having for dinner? I don't know yet. Finish this and see where it goes. That's how I live my life now. Should I move them files in here? I have enough space.

everything lines up

I just got back from sunday's flea market. I was looking for cast iron skillets. Rather than go there every sunday hoping to find one, I am better off saving that money and get one from amazon. This way, I get what I want and am assured of the quality. Everything has its own drawbacks, you get your reflection.

Kids are still sleeping. I am doing the laundry. I poped soon as I got home. Today I make spaghetti. Why is this different? I choose differently. I can get me some stuff. I am prioritizing things. Let's see how it goes. I can get a long ethernet cable, but that's in the past. I can always do wifi when needed.

For now, I am aligning with the frequency that I prefer. I am not needing. That is not what I prefer. I prefer to allow what needs to be there to just be there and use the energy. What does that mean? There is something here for me. Use the energy even if it were only contrast. It's an echo.

What you do with echo is use it for feedback. How far have I gone? How different are things now than it was before. This is why it's here. This is how you use it. Wife looks the same, but it's contrast. I know it's contrast and I respond that way. I don't have to fight that. I learned much in that process. That is priceless.

How do you know that? Some people learn stuff. I got to experience it and learned from that experience. This is where I am. Do I have to attend those meetups? I don't think so. The energy is fine. I like it. I enjoy that. Let's see how the next one goes. I don't have to be there though.

I always have a choice. It's always an opportunity at every moment. That is what I have. Everything is related that way. This is the abundance I see. It is who I am. It's all here for me. Maybe I can go and run early today. I can do yoga when they go to church. Let's see how that road trip goes.

They are aware that we don't have a ride. Surely wife invited them, but I don't think it goes that way. She lines up with her frequency. I guess it's time to move on. What happens next? Be open to what is. This leads to what's next but won't be there unless until you use up the energy. I wonder if wife read that email. Maybe I can send her one again.

I can ask her that. In the meantime, looking for holes, poking into them is like fun for now. You see where it goes, you take it as far as it will go. That's interesting. You also learn stuff from that. Like what? It's about the system. I can do one test every hour until I finish them. That is enough for me to go through all that.

I go take the test tomorrow. It's part of my process. I can only do my best. That's what I do each time. The result, that is expectation. Simply be in the moment. Spending time with her was a waste of time? I think so. It's time to move forward. That is a negative hole.

You know where this is all going. It's not where you want to be. I have one more from the library, then I sort through them and see which ones I keep. I don't have to keep everything in here. Just get the ones you need and see how things go.

If it were window$ then I don't need it. It's no longer relevant for me. What is relevant? Moving forward. I would rather do java and poking holes into something. That is more relevant. This phone charges faster than the older one. It runs on cyanogen. Maybe I can do better doing poking holes.

Can you use that as url? I think so. Nobody uses that for now. I will check later. If not, it is not relevant for you. Path of least resistance is how I discover stuff. It comes easy if not, then I don't go there. Unless it comes up all the time and I am interested.

It's like that. There was regret there. Emotions were involved. When you are not aware, you get sucked into it. It's her karma. It's her reflection. I don't have to get involved with that. I see where this is going. It's time to move on. I don't have to get something out of it.

It's time to get back to who I am. No need to go there. It's a pity it was like that. He's lucky that he is out of that relationship. It's a sucker. You get better results from something else. Like what?

I don't know yet. For now, I know this. I think it's I don't have to control everything. You get blinded by love. Soon as you get married and have kids, everything lines up and is brought into the light. That's not how I use it though. It's a meatphor. See it that way.

I am done.

works for me

There's this chant going on downstairs almost every morning. I guess he's a religious person. He's got people coming over regularly. One said they were cousins. They must have been here for some time now? I heard it was like four years. We have been here longer.

I am upset with wife. She behaves as if she's still living with relatives. She has that baggage. Her mom left them there when she was eight. That's sad. She never knew her dad. This friend she's accommodating doesn't really care about her. She only needs people adoring her.

She's like a starlet that never really made it there. She tried showbiz for a while but it fizzled out. Why is that? It must have something to do with her energy. I am not going to dwell on that. It's time to move on. I am going on that road trip to be with my kids.

I feel out of place in there. Why not stay at home instead. This way, I can do my gigs and then really miss them and be glad when they are back. That's four days. Can you make it across? Or I can sleep over somewhere with friends.

Wait. You don't have friends.

Is that good or bad? It means nothing. It says that you have been spending more time in here and with your kids than you did out there. You create your own reality experience. It's not happening to you. It's happening through you.

That is profound an idea. I have meetup on saturday. I am going this time. I have a method that works. I don't trade a lot this time, but most of the trades I made thus far gets me to the first base. I forgot what that's called in baseball. You get on base on every at bat.

I think that is better. You don't have to have homeruns each trade. Trading for me is like baseball. I used to enjoy trading like that. I can do that again. Or not. I sit there and watch how things go. This time though, I have more time to sit through it. The method still works.

How dyou you expand on this? Feel good about it. Everything is connected anyway. Do this and then do code. That is connected. I have time to write code this way and it's a business. I don't have to get a job. I already have one. I work for myself.

Expand on this more? I don't know how but this is a path I enjoy doing. This is my light. You don't have to know how things are going to turn out. Son got up early today. It's his last day of school. There is something poignant about it. I remember my school days.

Parents was there during his graduation. I felt it. Also two siblings were there. It moved to that dimension. It's always felt that way. Now I understand. It's all connected anyway. We get there one of these days. We are all connected anyway. I wrote them three words over under.

Sometimes it's like this. It's like the synchronicity time. You see it everywher and it's telling you that everything lines up for you. Trust in the timing. You see that insight from last night? I get upset when there is disturbance in the force?

I don't like enjoy going to facebook. It's a lot of baggage in there. No need to do that anymore. It's moved. Everything has changed since. What are you doing ow? Yo ucan have that lifestyle. You don't need someone else for that.

I want to check in on myfxbook. It seems like dev in there is quiet now. Maybe the forums in there suck. I hang out more at forexfactory. It's different in there. I like the energy over there than the other.

Why is sound on? I can turn that off. How does that work? This is the only os running on this laptop. I tried installing the old one but they, as usual made it difficult for me. Consider the fact that you paid for it and the people working on it are paid anyway, it's not a good product.

Better to use open source. You know you can work on it. If it don't, then use something else. This is where I am anyway. Do you want to try that one? I can do that. That sounds interesting. It's the same platform though. And that one is a different skin for the same animal. Might as well stick with this one.

I can do a lot. Things can go this way or that. Do you want to do that road trip? I don't know. I can go for the kids. After that, i'm not sure. I want to hang out with kids. I can do change in routine through that season. Let's go there anyway. It's all connected this way.

somewhere some how

What would be cool is an app or service that, when your alarm sounds in the morning, all your gadgets starts charging. Or something that, soon as you get in the door, that gadget starts charging. Maybe a set level where when detected will trigger the charging sequence.

You will need hardware for that. It will send the charge to your gadget via radio or something-else frequency. I am sure it's already working in some lab. So you have that lab? It's hidden in some recess of my mind. It's made manifest when I shift into that frequency.

One kid goes to school. The rest are already on vacation. He went to bed late last night. Wife was still watching tv, I had to do the dishes so I don't fall asleep waiting. The other daughter was still up finishing a game.

Play games all day is fun. It can be time consuming if you are not aware of it. I used to play simcity all day and not go with the wife. Back then, there were cracks. I gave it a shot and saw a different part. Recent circumstance showed my perception were wrong? Only different.

The cat prefers human food lately--meat. There's cat food, but to him, it's junk food. It's processed food and it's probably making him sick. He's hanging out around here asking for meat. Let's see what happens here. This table is too high for typing. I can move over there, or a different table altogether.

This here is ok enough for browsing and coding. It faces the door which I can leave open in case we get a delivery. I wonder when my stuff gets here. I think this week somewhat. We'll see how that goes. Wife ordered lots of stuff. She got surprised by the bill.

Was she not thinking of that? She orders lots of stuff online. Why did she not check these things. Why is the cat not eating? I don't know. At least he has a choice. This is a male cat. That's ok. He's a cool guy. He shows me how to live life. I learn much from this guy.

It's monday. I go to school today as wednesday is probably the last day, or friday. We shall see. I don't have to go to finishing day. I may not get that cert. I am curious as to how to sit those cert exams. Am I taking it? I paid for it. I might as well take it.

I can do a month to learn all that, then sit the exams. When do you do it?

I can do this over the holidays. Come january, I sit the exams. That way, it's behind me and done with. Let's see how it goes. I have enough resources with me to go learn much. I even can upload stuff through linux. It's just that these things will rely on memory.

As a workaround, I can start doing them over and over and learn stuff that way. It is a possibility. I will start off with the basics and work my way up. I have enough in here to make it work. I think we can do that then. It's part of the process as it is here with me. Let's get cracking then.

Soon as I get over and done with that, I can proceed with my stuff. I have always been curious about it. I can do that and see what happens. Son is up and about. Wife also got up. They two are leaving for their thing this morning.

She is going to swing by. I show her seek on my browser to show her, make her think I am looking for work. It's not work really I am after. I am growing my business here. You don't have to be that out...why am I responding that way.

Something on this laptop sounds like scraping. It must be the hard drive. Is this going to die out soon? It is three years that is my target date. We'll see if this goes that way. Otherwise, I am over and done with this brand.

I walk up and down queen st. today. Wife has a cool laptop. It's thin and is very light. I thought it wasn't in her bag the other day. It's a thinkpad. Those are good workstations. We'll get there someday. Get the frequency and you will see that, maybe better. It's this is that.

That won't make sense in a different perspective. Is this what it's about? You are always learning anyway. This is where we are. I don't have to respond to that. How you respond is your creation. When you don't respond to something, then it didn't really happen. If that tree falling in the forest were real, then there be a lot of things real.

Like what? Anything you can imagine is real in some way some where.

serves a purpose

I have issues. It's about twenty minutes before wife gets driven to bus stop. I can go to class today, or not. It's my choice. It could be rain today. I can skip today, then go tomorrow. There's not much doing in there anyway. I think class ends on wednesday, or friday. Let's see how things go.

I did two days already. I can skip today. If weather don't improve, I can choose to go some other day. I got up late today. I had a dream I was going through stuff with someone and was followed along. It could be my higher self. It was there all along and was more efficient and effective than what I was doing. My yeysight is not improving. Right eye, then left is going that way.

What happened there? I made changes to pulseaudio yesterday. Do you want to keep that? Should I do something else? Like do arch linux? There is that other ubuntu pentest distro. It's older and not up to date like this ubuntu. I can go there, or do something else.

There is a java tutorial class. I can go there myself. But what are they going to achieve that way? Maybe get learners on board then expand from there. Do you want to go there? That is two hours of what you are doing. Maybe do something else. It's not an all out yes. I can do something else.

There's fifteen on the waitlist. Do something else. You don't have to go there. There are resources out there that you can go into anyway. Let's go there and see what happens. Or not. I can use that four hours better. I learn more in an hour by myself than going to class.

That's why it is no longer relevant for me. Why is the path different? It's feedback for you. This way, you see the contrast and can choose to make adjustments to the source code. It's still reflection for you. Everything is opportunity that way. What are you going to do about it?

See that contrast and choose how to go about it. There was fire in takapuna yesterday. I don't know where it was. It would be interesting to be a fireman that way. Chase from house landed that role in chicago fire. Maybe make stories out of that.

That be an interesting story. There's not much action but there be drama. Most of the time, it's dry and you are not doing anything. So the community creates that and supports that. Where does funding come from? It's from the community tax. This is why it's there. That is the important fundings.

When you need more funds, there be benefactors. You are one of them. Do you need those kinds of apps. Are they opportunistic? I don't think so. They do provide a service for that. It's the company that pays for it. They are tax deductible. You own your company and you can go there all the time.

Next class is going to be about that. I can go today or not. It's up to me anyway. I can go. The kids are going to be home anyway. Or I can sit here and do my tutorials. I have that project ready for submit. Just get that and see how it goes. At least you got something in there. Put that in that usb stick then transfer.

Or I can zip it up, put that in drive then get on with your life. Is there going to be a graduation? I think so. I can go monday. Or tuesday. There is that schedule. It changes from time to time. I spend time better in here. I don't have to go today. I am done and this is the last week anyway.

I can pay the wife if I still owe her anything. The next stop is january midweek. Let's see what happens there. Should I go there and take them certs? I can do something better here on. Like what? You don't need certs for java. Csharp is riding on momentum. There's not much being created on that side of the fence. It's all jobs.

But there be apps on that side of the os that are used a lot. There is pokerstars apps and that cottage industry. You can look into that but I am so done with that already. Go for the exams, then do something else. Finish that? I think you can do that. Start over and see what happens.

I can do that during the holidays. It's why it's there but I am not going to use it. I am not going to get jobs on that side of the fence. Or maybe I can. Like, I would rather do php than go into that.

Or get on with my business. I can do android and pentest as a business. Create stuff that way. I spend time better that way. I enjoy time better that way. What then is the decision about? I don't know which way to go. I have been going around in circles.

They all serve a purpose. It's all part of the process. Your process.

more than enough

Woke up this morning with negative feeling. In the dream, I was fighting someone,something an entity. I remember throwing a punch and hit air. I woke up. I was upset with the wife last night. She would rather finish a crap movie than come to bed with me. In the morning she complains about it. This is her 24 christmas tradition.

It don't make sense, it's too challenging going into that crowd, but she enjoys doing it. I don't mind if she goes through that, but I would rather just sit on the side, ride my bike going there and watch the craziness of people shopping. She don't get that.

It breaks her expectations and lashes out on me that way. I have learned to just say fuck it. Next week is the last in class. Fiona don't get back until the middle of january. That's when I start communicating and exploring possibilites. In the meantime, I am back to my lessons. I may be broke for a few weeks, but soon as I get the momentum going, it's all downstream for me--at least by reflection.

Is that what you want? Yes. Running my own business and on the internet. I don't have to make anything. All I need to do is be in the light at all times. I can create an app, then sell it. Or be an outsource provider for these apps for people who can't make them. I can finish a tutorial in one day. In one week, that's seven.

I can do one tutorial a week even. It's still a lot and will go through the library in a year. Still that's plenty for you. There's abundance if you want it. I don't have to go to old school. This is the new stuff. What can you make outo f it?

I don't even have to go through them tutorials. I can do the book instead. What's happening to me there. I was in despair when I got up. What can I do about it? Be in the light. Check under the hood. I feel like things are taken away from me. This is a definition. You can choose to redefine things and put everything in alighnment. I am minifying.

I am letting go of things that do not matter to me anymore. That bike would be gone the next day if that were in the philippines. Same with ours. People are walking around all the time. That's their job. I see that. I don't have to go in there. It is her 'tradition' to get a job. I don't have to get in that car.

What then do you do. She expects something from you. I don't even have to match her expectations. I can go on my own. I don't have to be in that car with her. Do you see the difference?

This is where I am. Everything here is relevant for me. I can do my thing from now on. I don't even have to go there other than to submit my project. The last day is on wednesday. I show up then. At least I did what needs to be done there. Do I have to do something else?

I don't have to. Programmers, we don't create things from scratch. There's always something there. I don't even have to go there. I can and will learn what I need to learn when I need it. He was insisting with this kid that he do things his way and he will pass. I don't learn that way. I am fighting it.

I am staying home today and run my business from here. I am outsource provider for android app development. Not everyone can go there. The competition is online. That's a given. There's risk there. If you don't want to go there, then you have a solution here.

I have started using an ide. It's easier and it gets the job done. Learning it is also a path. I am doing that. It gets there all the time. I don't have to use vim all the time anyway. It's here and I will move forward with this. And then I can finish that library. That's an expectation right there.

I havet' been to takapuna by bike in a while. I can go there today. I can walk and put the bike in smales. Or do something else. I will walk later anyway. I ride the bike, then do yoga in the evening. Or do something else. In the meantime, this is where I am.

There is chicken curry. The wife made it last night but the kids don't want that anymore. I can get them noodles to make for dinner. Then they have another one for the following day. That crosses the bridge from where I am. I don't have to go in there. I have to work to get some. I don't agree with that. I am into something else instead.

How do you know it works? I don't know. Everything is by reflection. Did she have to do it that way? I don't know. I chose thi anyway. I could have gone someplace else. I could have looked into that instead. But this is the path I am in. I learned something here.