Pages

have chosen now

I'm not sure if I wrote this morning, but i'm moving morning pages to nights. I feel down at nights more so when I have to wait until midnight to pick up the wife. I can write about my thoughts and emotions, also experience during the day.




I don't know how it's going to help but at least I am not going to fixate on these ideas and put them down on the page and see what comes out of it. I have my friend playing in the background. I feel change is afoot. It's like spring coming in and you see small flowers here and there.

There is contrast, and I am alright with it. I am reminding myself who I am at every moment anyway. With that idea comes echo from who you used to be, and feedback as to how you are doing now. I guess writing this time is better. I feel light already. This is better than learning something new. I will limit that to up till ten and then I get to doing time for myself.




We have plenty of wind. Why is that? Are we going to have rain soon? I like that location there. Son is using it. Maybe during the day I can move there. I give that to myself. The stream is up and down. It changes now and then. I can delete the older files, those that do not resonate with me. I am alright with that.

I can also delete those that are inaudible--negative recordings. I can't hear them anyway. It's all coming from you anyway. You don't have to see it from the outside. Be in the inside and you see the reflection and projection come forth.




The years are far behind now. What was there. I had a great time during that time. I have these times when things transition. I see. Change is always happening. You create your reality from the inside. You know this. It's time to be in the light. It's a choice for you. Either be in the dark and not feel good about it, or choose your thoughts.

You define your source code, then resonate with that. It's that simple. Why then did I let myself feel down? It's because I was responding to what I...my opinion of what is on the outside. Now you are aware, you can choose differently. This is why it's feedback. You are given the opportunity to choose what is good for you.




That is the motivation. You choose what you think is good for you. There was a different perspective term for that but I forgot what it was. Then it's not relevant for now. Move on. That pie looks good. How to make that? You get flour and make the base. I can also make pizza.

But that is not who I am. I have this year to resonate with my frequency. I can do differently. I am at peace here and there is contrast here and there. So be it then. I don't have to go back. If it were relevant, we'd be there pointing downstream. Here is where I am and this is what's connected for me.




Trust that synchronicity. It's all connected. I can sleep at two anyway. I can take a nap later on. I am able to make things work. So be it then. I get help because I give help. It's that frequency. You attract to you everything that's relevant for that vibration. It's all here and now. So be it. Write about it.

I don't have to make this a best selling novel. I write for myself to connect to flow. I don't have to prove anything here anyway. So it's here and it's here for my self. That person I talked to was a painter. I wonder why he is down here renting when he has his own place up north.




I think it has something to do with the old idea that you need it from the outside. If I was in those shoes, I will focus my efforts to the new reality. I am not doing this right now. I realize that. I have shifted. I have chosen now. I am in alignment now. I don't have to write fast. Only that I be more connected with the writing. It don't have to make sense.

Feel your fingers reaching for the right key. It don't have to be fast. Only that you feel that finger reaching for each key. Feel the clarity. There is connection to flow in that moment. It's all connected moment. I am almost done and maybe three more paragraphs. I am closing my eyes so I can write and not thing about it.




I have one down. Then superman is flying. Why bringht colors? I think they are changing that already. They made him look like batman and even so, his colors have changed. Why do they make bad movies on that. I don't know. Maybe they have this idea that it should be this way or that. It's not connected. It's contrived. It's all special effect.