i let myself get too involved into other people's baggage. I know there's something there for me it's why they're here. But the drama and the definitions, i can do without.
I just called my son stupid in a negative way and i feel bad about it. Now i am going to have this in my head for a while. I can choose to let go. Starts today we are doing tidy habits. It's tough on day one because you need to clean house. But i get sucked into their drama anyway. So i get them into my habits so i don't have to deal with their baggage. Clean house.
The kitchen is easy view from this table. I can tell them to tidy up immediately soon as they finish. I am no longer going to tolerate these things. This is my habit now. They not ride on that and they will build their own tidiy habits. And so is the wife. She's part of all this anyway. Why does she have all that? They have their own rooms. They can choose to do something there. They are not going to have their stuff on the floor. They put things away.
The ones that are on their immediate vicinity are the stuff they need for school work. Other than that, i don't want to see them here. They can easy get their stuff from somewhere. I only have a few things and if i had a room, they'd be in the room. I put away my own stuff. So i am letting off steam here. What can i do? I can hug him later and say that i love him. I feel bad calling my son stupid. I was upset. I had to show that i am upset. I got sucked into all that drama for nothing.
I asked him if he looked under and around his table. He said yes. He didn't. He just said yes to shut me up. I am so upset right now. I need to put things in order otherwise i'm the housekeeper. This is why i couldn't get a thing going. I get upset and it puts me in a tailspin. Why is this here anyway? This has been my fulltime job. It's not what i prefer.
What do you prefer. I would rather live my life. I don't want them in my hair all the time. It's drama i can live without. I don't want to have to tell them all the time but this is what i can do now. I clean up myself. How come they can't do it? It's changing now. Things are different from now on. I don't have to do anything else but ride on them to tidy up and build on their own habits.
This is why it's here then? I think so. We can let it go now? When i am aware of it then i can let go. I do yoga after this kid goes out the door. I go out to run later as well. I used to go to bed at ten. Now i can't because these two can't work together. What can i do about it? Why did wife get her a closet anyway? I don't get it. Now the old closet isn't doing anything.
There was a workaround there. This time, i do things my way. I am not going to do things for them. They are old enough already. If you use it, you wash it soon as you are done. Not later. When i go to the kitchen myself i wash theirs. But if they wash they won't even bother washing whatever else is in front of them. Why should i wash theirs now?
I am so upset. I don't think there's going to be internet for everyone. We are going to tidy up. I am so upset now. Wake up tidy up your bed. Get home from school, put away everything. If you are not going to use them then i am going to use them myself. If not they can do something else altogether.
I can put something in the bathroom but there's a lot that you can do in here. Like what? I don't know. If they can't live with that then they have to. I am not going to do things for them. I am not going to tolerate them leaving the computer on when they go. Things are different now. I am going to make that a habit of mine. I am done carrying shit for them. This is my space. It's time they respect my space.
I don't have to do things for the wife. I am so upset still. I am letting off steam and scheming something about this. It's the little things. You make them into a habit and you make something big out of it. I can tell them why we need them habits. I ride on them. This is my habit now. When i see what is alignment then i can let go. Otherwise, my habits hold sway.
They develop their own. They go into their heads and it reflects back. I see how things hould go from here. It's going to be different from now on. I make my habit into leadership habits. This way, i don't have to carry their shit for them. Do something for someone else. Do one thing for someone else each day. How do you make that a habit?
I don't know yet. For now, only do this. Tell them to work together. Maybe i can turn off the internet or something. Let's do that then. I can see where this is all going. I can take care of that. What are they doing differently? I don't know. I can set something up and see what happens. I can say it turned off by itself. From there she can't play them games or do online stuff.
I see. Everyone is doing these things anyway. Why am i so upset? It's clearing now. I feel the weight is lifting off my head. Let's write some more. Do yoga later. Can i run first yoga later? That'll change perspectives around here. I am doing the laundry later. I could have gone to sleep last night but had to work on the wife. That took out the thunder from me. What was that about?
I forgot. What can we do here? I don't know. There's nothing good out there. You can have yogurt but is it really what you want? I have briskets. I can do that today. I can make that for lunch and have that throughout the day. I am still upset. I can choose to change how i think. I can redefine the source code. That helps.
Ok. What else is here that i can do? Go see something in alignment, or not. Go poop. What time is she going? If it's lunch then i'll have to move my yoga to later. Or not. I think she leaves around ten. I am moving my yoga around her schedule? I don't think it works that way. What can we do here? That wasn't the way it's supposed to be.
I get that. What else is there. I don't know. Both of them are at fault here. I take things easy but if i start to carry their bagage, then they are going to hear about it. So be it then. I don't have to go there then. She has her own ref. Why not put water in it so i don't have to? She has her own water bottles anyway.
That's a thing there. Don't let me carry your baggage. You build up strength by carrying your own baggage. If it gets too heavy you can ask for help. I still have it then. What can i do differently? Do your own habits. Do your own little thing. You can put in your own water bottle in there. No need for those big containers. You can throw them out now. Just put in your own.
Everyone will have their own then? I think it works better that way? They won't put water in it anyway. Why bother. I can use my own from now on. How do you move forward with this? I don't know yet. You bake, you should clean up your own trays. I think it's supposed to be that way. I am not the housekeeper anymore. That'snot my job anymore. I can do things for the wife because she does things for me.
I am still upset here. I need to take a break here. I am upset because i called my son stupid. That's nothing. Other parents do worse things. I was upset. He didn't do what he could have done himself. I helped carry his baggage. I took away his power. I see that now. I have changed. It's not going to happen anymore. It's why this happened i am changing things for myself.
Then i can simmer down tnow. Things are different now. It's no longer here. The echo is in your head. See what now. You can let this go. You can choose your thoughts, yes? Then choose your thoughts. You have already written something about it. You've already sorted things out. Now you can change things around. What can i do different here?
I don't know. One can sleep in there while the other sleeps someplace else. I see. I don't have to separate things. It's their baggage. They can work things out themselves. That closet was uncalled for. I could have complained about it. She didn't do anything about it anyway. That one is still out here. Why isn't it in there or in the garage?