you are selfish. You were going through a rough patch. You wanted life to be easy so you chose to have an affair. You kept it secret for six years. You say husband and kids are your priority and yet you kept it for six years. And now that you've come clean, you want your life to be peachy?
Something's not right here. I am angry upset about all this. I have insistence. It's not about her. It's about my insistence. So what if she kept it secret. That's on her not me.
Still i hold on to this. Now i have thisand bitcoin isnt doing well. I be grinding my way through this. You see how i have embraced the exit plan. I am an eternal being. If i take that samurai path, then i go the path that's most challenging.
But why am i still here. If this were to end, it should have. Do i listen to that. I am invalidating. Simply put this in my awareness. I can choose. What are my choices. I canceled today's booking, made a new one for tomorrow.
Forecast is rains. I would rather sit and wallow in my negativity. How does that help me. It uses up the energy? I am not invalidating. I am going deeper into self. Youcant fix make sense in this level. You needto zoom out.
Staying at home wont fix anything. Not talking about it will neither get this sorted. Maybe it doesnt need sorting. Maybe you simply be in the present. You got something from the experience. Why not simply move on.
That's a light of hope. But hope implies despair. It sounds positive but it is negative. Better to be in knowing. You get how this works. This doesnt have to make sense. You dont have to fix this.
Just because you dont see the results you want doesnt mean i'm not doing anything. She is being selfish. What am i then. Am i being selfish here. Do i need to watch you again. Do i need to verify everything and not have to trust?
That's not my preferred state of being. I would much rather walk away than to have to watch you. Now what. We back at square one. But it's not. It's not the same starting point. You have much awareness into this.
I am on tilt. I am on tilt. Having to go every memory and label them as not real. That's fake enough. That's why she was excited about moving. They had plans together. Every single thing. It wasnt real.
She wont have time for you today. She be working. But if she had to she can take time off for him. This is messed up. How do you move on from here. You dont. You wallow on this if you have to.
It doesnt have to be perfect. Just work with what you have. Just do this. Get to the other side. Trust the synchronicity in all this. It's all connected. How do i move on from here. I'm not really sure.
I needs to fast. Simply ride out to fast. You can take it easy. Just go and fast anyway. They go to vet. I wonder if she be going solo this time. I think so. I be at work anyway. Just get to the other side.
I am on tilt here. I be doing the same thing all day anyway. It doesnt matter how you go. This is terrible. How to move on with this. Trust the timing. You were selfish. You are selfish.
How do i move on from this. You simply let go. It sounds easy but i am not letting go. Why is that. What do you get out of it. That she needs to get punished for all this. Your actions have consequences.
I dont know what to make of this. Dog is sleeping. I needs to get away from this. Her actions have consequences. I dont have to protect her from the consequences of her actions. That is not being responsible. What then. Be in the moment. If you dont want to forgive, then so be it. You dont have to make it positive.
