over the hump?

 i think we're over that issue now. It's mine, i own this. I can choose my energy. And that's the point? Not quite. There's plenty here for you. It's just the obvious things at the moment.

This too, evolves. You know it. I can move on now. It's not the same river, not the same experience. How then. You see how that unfolds. You sits and trade how this pair works out. Is this better. 

Can i trade me something else? I believe so. But this swings wider than usual. It's worth the risk because of this. Then we have a new pair to trade. I can work something out throughout the day.

What comes next. You get an alert, or check in during the day. I can trade in this direction or not. I be getting acquainted with the phone app more. I have anxiety. The drills help out in between games. I be getting that reserved this morning.

The only days she dont play is when she works in the city. In the meantime, we spend a lot of time together in this way. I continue on with ligaw-mode. It works for me. Does it ever get old. It's not for her but my energy. 

I think i can remove this alarm for now. Or not. See how this works out. Youcould have stopped yourself out with that one. Or it stays with the account, close it out in the future. But that trade will take something out on there. 

What time did that happen. I think it was prior to the open. You hee how this works out then. How to trade. You can keep the position if it were that way. But you see how this too is connected. You have this perspective.

This one lined up all with the least effort. There was a lot of pain--insistence on what the outcome ought to be. I see that now. This is what's relevant for my growth. It's not the same anymore. Do you get rewarded? 

No, but there is reflection. This is way much better because it's with you, within you. It never gets eaten by the earth. It's not an illusion. I can leave later at nine. I do runs until it's all done. After work, i head out to tennis park and meet her there.

I can have coffee after this. I think dog is sleeping in the bed again. Will that ever happen? She has her senses with her now. It's not the same boat. Even if she fell for that, i think it's not the same.

How do you know. Because i chose so. Because i choose how i experience this. What's next for us. Focus on your health. There is plenty here for you. I dont think she's fit enough for that yet.

Then you simply return the ball that way. How to get more of that them drills on there. I can do them every day. Or go when she has socials. I can work in the park. I come back later anyway. Or i can do something else.

You get how all this works out. She can get up way much earlier, or not. I can use that phone instead. You can make a living off this. Or not. You get the idea. It moved much and a lot from there. 

I can trade this market. There is much difference with this one and you get how to work things out. And you have all this in place anyways. You go this way and that. It's all connected anyway.

We dont have to deal with this andthat. Simply go this way. Then you see how to work things out. Am i in a hurry with this. It feels like it. Have coffee now.

the big ring

 price didnt touch lower bands and is now testing the uppers. That's bullish. I had issues yesterday. It's the meaning you put into it. Time to heal this thing.

I have a proposal planned for when kids arrive. They arrive some time around 3 or 4. We stop by that location. Where is parking? Not sure i remember. We can park at dfo, walk in that direction.

Where else. The casino parking is going to bleed us though. Where else can you find parking. I'm not sure. But this is where we are right now. I have that savedup. I be saving more in the coming weeks.

When it's time to order, i get one through bitcoin loan, then pay them back over time. That works out. Thisis the general direction for me. Watch those borrows. You needs to offset them with trades. Then watch the trades then. 

Got it. I think i have everything in place. I see the structure. The govt is an ego extension to control, not in a negative context though. You dont need control. You only trust the synchronicity. 

It's in place to channel things around. Once that's set up you run everything by synchronicity. The sleep was good and deep. It rained last night. Was that faked? I dont know. I really cant tell this time. 

I guess it gets old for her. But still, it was a long foreplay going into it.i think it's time to move on. It feels different. The clouds have cleared. I got a lot out of it. Let's get moving then. 

I have something to look forward to. This is for the ego. But you get how all this works out. Let's get going. I can work with the synchronicity. I can work through the unknown. I would rather have this than the familiar where it's not unfolding. 

It still does unfold but because you switch to oen. I can stay home but i would rather head out. It's more time to self. Plus i get an extra hundred today. I can simply do this target then head home early.

Do i want to go there. I can do this instead. She be sleeping. Ithink she wants to play but the courts are wet. I can notify herthat. Let's get moving then. Trust the timing on this one. 

You get how all this works out. You've just deep-dived into one of the biggest lessons in the universe. You came out positive even though it was a lot to process. The process is the point. Now you have that. 

It isnt that it takes time, but that you have all this instead. I can also go for that one in docklands. Where there. By the end of that road. Hmm. There's more parking on there. It doesnt have to be fancy like that.

I prefer that other one though. It's not the plenty people, but that the scenery is amazing in that context. It plays out in my head. I can work with that. It is about color and all that. I can see how it works out.

It is about choice. Everything is. You have an abundance of choice in this way. I can get that out and put it in something else. But you prefer something else altogether. Now you know how to work with through synchronicity. 

Let's get going. I got much out of this. Let's see how this plays out. I can simply go the other way. I havent been doing practice. You get how that works and can do in similar fashion. 

I can work in the garage. There are places on there that has the same thing altogether. It doesnt have to be on the outside. Where else can we park around there. I think you see how this works. I can help with that.

rained like never before

 it rained again last night. This time hard. The last time i saw rain like that was at matimco. What happened then. What's different this time.

The lesson is that she responds to other stimuli--mental and emotional. I get that now. This was the lesson. Also other lesson is that i forgot. But this time it's all way much different. I'm a different person. She is a different person.

This resonates with me. I also have the crypto-trading platform. I have income coming in this way. That's all positive then. What comes next. You cross-over to the other side. Take it one day at a time. I have time-delay capsules on my thoughts.

You dont have to process all that information now. You can schedule them for a delay. We be going to warrnambool this weekend. I am excited for that. I needs to be getting my license soon. I can work on that. Weekend this is work? No. We play. We explore a different part of australia.

Simply be open. You never know what's on the other side. You explore all this. You dont even have to go on there. You simply do this, get to the other side. This pair moves much. How do you know it's time to short.

You observe price action. Does it have momentum. Is it accumulation or distribution. All these add up. I have much in there already. Trust the timing on this. You know what you are doing. It's positive like that but you get the idea.

What are my other options. You can work with that, or this one. It doesnt matter much but you have all this in place. They ...that is separation. You know see how it's all connected. Now you get it. It's time to move on then. 

You have ideas but it's all you really. It's not separate from you. It comes from you like this way. I have much others plus this and it crosses over like so. Is it going to go back. I dont think it will.

But that's local-mind thinking. I've learned not to trust, but to resonate. Knowing is resonance. I have these tools. It's part of me. I have it in balance. Thisis what it's about then. I guess so. 

You continue on. This is third day i think and it's been slow ok. No quests this time. I be out this weekend. I think they measure that but it is something else. You get how these things work. Ti rains but didit really. I'm not sure it did. 

I have a stop-market short on cel-p. This is the hedge i have on that. Can i trade this differently. I slept well last night. She comes in to snuggle and i'm at the edge of the bed. I'd rather have it this way than previous. 

I still cant believe shit happened. It was a reflection for me. Ilearned more about my self. This happened for a reason and i have it like this. You can add more to that short, but this is trading rules.

You get there eventually. For now, you only do this. It look sstrong anyway. Just get to the other side. It looks weak but you got out when it was about to turn-around. That's the point to all this. 

I get to see all this first-hand. That's the point. You learn much and it's all connected. I think you can work something out this way. She can delete old messages but you get how all these work out. 

Why would you go that way. I dont have to process that. It's here and now. You get what all this is about. It started on there. You see how it is. I am starting to feel that. I observe. Is it the pain-body eckhart was talking about.

I be doing that part today. I recharge that thing. I have phones recharging. We can go this way and that. You get how all this is connected. I'd rather be with her like this. The elbows are healed. Yo ucan continue with this.

perfect day - fun date

 i had a great time last night. All day yesterday was great, looking back. It rained in the morning. We had coffee.

Even though there was a light shower, we played tennis. Later that night, we went to a karaoke bar. We had dinner at meet fresh. Coming home, she said she had fun. And then it rained again a second time. This time, it was more intense. 

I seldom have rain twice in a day. But it did. And it was great. I guess those times were different than this. The tools work. It's there because of synchronicity. Things are way different now. Do you prefer this?

Things happened. It did so for a reason. I'm beginning to see things unfold in this direction. I think i prefer this than any other timelines. I expand in this frequency. It's all an illusion anyway. 

Do i head out to work? I dont have to. Those times come around and i can work straight then. It's not the ride. It's the being lonely part. I see that now. I can choose. What do i choose this way. I'm not realy sure. It's going to rain next week.

Things are starting to clear up anyway but i had a great time last night. It was different. I dont think it'll revert back. You never cross the same river twice. Plus i listen to my intution more now. I dont act on it at time, but i see what's different this time.

I cant bring back the past and i cant change it. I can only do so through my self, in the here and now. I can go ride or not. If stay home, we can play tennis. Go out and ride. I took the day off yesterday.

I needs to be on there riding. I needs to be alone with myself. This is how i integrate. It's the inside thoughts that run rampant. I have awareness in there. I come home soon as i'm done. 

This is the path then. I guess it's ok. We have this in place. It's not the same river twice. I did not act on that but you get how price action works this time. It's not yet time to short. If you want a quick trade, look for entry going long.

I am starting to feel energy. Check the filters. I dont think the media out there helps much. I have guidance and this resonates better with me for me. Stay in this frequency then. 

The bus ride takes as long as the bike. I'd rather take the bike as bus is for zombies. This is what i've seen. This is my synchronicity. It all works out. I can tune in to that instead. Is there a wall i can play off there. I dont think so. 

I can ride out then meetup with her. I think i prefer that one better. Let's get going then. Things are not the same. I have a break this time and do walls next. Thisis my synhcronicity. I trust the timing in my life.

I have something to lookforward to. I guess so. It's not the same rivertwice. She's more mature now. She is. That's great. I raised great kids. It's good that this is here.i get triggered and sad, but it's thoughts. It's all an illusion. Thisis what i work with now. What comes next. I stay home do nothing much.

If i heads out, i eat that chunk down to zero. Plus i get to help out during the week. This is resonating with me. It's not the same river twice. It's getting old really. You can work on something else.

I think id do that. I can do me another set. We sleep that way. It's great. Moving forward i do this. I think she's still on there. She had great memories. But it's all her. The other was a brute. It's not much of a brain man, but there's talk there.

It's behind us now. She's changed her ways. Even if it were to show up, it's not thesame anymore. I am wounded because i choose that. What do i get out of this. Aha. Stay with the enquiry. This is how you get creative.

detach from illusion

 how come it was easy effortless that it expanded yet mine took a lot. Was it something that had to be there? 

Why did she call me with problems ...i write them down so i dont dwell on them. I bring them up on the apt timing so she'll know about these things. No sense dwelling on them. Act on your joy. 

It's not the same river. This is not her anymore. There is the realisation. I got the 4d tools out of this. I dont think they are even aware of such a thing. What if it's a figment of my imagination. Does it help you? 

If it helps, why would it not be real. What's the value of this? You accelerate itno 4d. You become a being of 4d. It doesnt come with money, but way more than that. You have an awareness of synchronicity flows through you.

It's not luck. Synchronicity is you. It's inherent in you. You are creator. This is what reality is about. Keep it in the background then. You get how all these work out. Get going. You know how to work this.

Trust the timing. It doesnt have ...message sent. She's still sleeping but she'll check into it later. This way i dont dwell on them, get triggered by them but she is aware of these. I can move on now. 

I head out to work. I ride longer this way but it is part of my process. I fast. I eats tomorrow i guess, some time after lunch. It's a saturday. She'll be working. We might do tennis. I can eat later when it's all settled.

Or i can do another extend towards sunday or maybe even monday. That sounds great. This has momentum to it. How do you feed this energy. You do the instruction manual. What about this. 

All this time you were doing trading. Now you have an asset that works. It had to go through that in the background so by the time you resonate, the structure is there. It was effortless for you. It built itself up. 

How to expand on this. I can pay it off this week with this one day out. I can go further tomorrow or somewhat there. You have an idea as to how all this works out. I dont dwell on that.

Price went up to 24k. That's big. I went in at 19-something. That's like a long way from now. That's a positive direction. They have jobs. I have trading. This is my joy if you can call it that.

Not a lot of people from my past have stayed on with this the long time. They think it works with bull markets. They would rather have jobs than a business that scales up and down.

All that was part. It was to be integrate. That's why it's there. You got something out of it. Now you move on. I can do yoga. Or not. Simply take a nap. I can head out back there. She goes to bed earlier, start work early. I can work with that.

She'd wake up to that. I go back to bed with these things. It started out harmless. It escalated once he got you hooked. That'show easy it is to groom someone. Now you expand in your preferred state of being.

What is my preferred state of being. I dont know anymore. Then you have dis-oriented from the status quo. Now you are free to redefine yourself. That's a positive. How do you choose to go from here.

She dont have to be here. It's the thoughts i have that doesn resonate with me anymore. Aha. Now i can choose something else. This is what you got out of it. You can expand here and now. It's gone now. 

4d tools

 4D tools. That's what you got out of it. You get to learn how to use them on a deeper level.

This is priceless. It's more than anyone else got out of this experience. Your partner agreed from a spirit level to be part of this. Acceptance is the swtich. You have the instruction manual. Be here and now and you will get to explore learn use more of the tool.

Not to compare, but the reason they dont did not get the tools is that they are not operating from 4th density. You are. This circumstance pointed it out to you. If you need to verify, look to the here and now.

Aha. That is key. How then. Simply use the tools when at the moment of choice. You get to practice much. It's also has to do with manifestation and experience. It's not that you are going to be rich, but that you are going to live a much fuller life.

Write down as much of it as you can, but the tools work by synchronicity. You dont force things to happen. You are going to trust the timing...trust the synchronicity. It's not a mental process. It's much higher than that. 

You learn more about the tools by synhcronicity. Ok. I go on this path then. You have all this in place. It's always been this way. You can't change the past. Power on the tools with acceptance, surrender. 

It's on a different plane. Higher or lower doesnt have judgement and invalidation. It's simply stating what's there. Maybe there's a better word for it, but this escapes me now. Trust the timing. It'll come around.

I can do this or that. I think i can switch that back on, but low power be good for now. It doesnt have to adjust to that. I write about these things. I put in that title so it's easier to search in the future.

These tools are priceless. You can't order these off the shelf. They come to you by synchronicity. Aha. This makes it more interesting. It doesnt have to do anything with the physical illusion. 

The tools help you to zoom out and gives you a higher frequency perspective energy experience. Use it that way. Aha. No need to compare. You have this. You go with her because you are exploring from the inside, as she explores on the outside.

From a higher frequency perspective, she came here with you and agreed to be in this situation out of love. What's he barking at. It's not the same. Accept and use the tool. Ok. I get that. This is why it happened. 

You now operate at a different frequency. You can choose to go back lower frequency, but you saw, experienced why it's no longer relevant for you. This is why i write. I get insights. Truth or not, it is revealed to you.

I cant change that. Accept and use the tools. You have this at your disposal. I dont have to compare my self to it. I have tools. Things are way different now. He did not contact but that was part of the experience. 

Things are different now. See it that way. You are using the tools now. This is priceless. Even the richest men in the world doesnt have access to these tools. They are not even aware that it exists. You do.

Aha. I compare but that is verification. I am pleased. I am grateful. This is where i need to be. I allow. I see what my next steps are. Use these tools. They are a gift. It's a present. 

I have these to play with today. I explore deeply and use these tools. I have so much. I got something priceless out of this experience. Now things are different. It's not the same boat. What comes next. Not really sure. I see that i go back. Power on the tools and use them.

not the same but good

 i dont have to dwell on that. It's all in the past. Lessons  learned, reflections feedback. Time to resonate. Move on? Phrase is incomplete. Resonate is better. Healing? Somewhat ok, but not quite. 

I can drain the power off these. Trust the timing on here. We get the balls later, have lunch, then tonight is tennis lessons. This is all positive. This works for me. Clarence is watching me, with sleepy eyes.

Watching videos on here. Not doing much. This is the resonance. This is on that level and i am experience part of the equation. I have also emotion and energy lined up. If so, just be in this moment.

Things are not the same. It may look like it, but my response is not the same. There is awareness. This is the mustard seed. Ok. Do i want to watch see that documentary? I'm not keen about it right now. Writing works ok. It resonates with me.

Maybe i can take a nap on here. I am getting sleepy. We get lunch in a moment. Should i go into ai? Not really, unless it is something that resonates with you. I can feed data into it. I am going t olook into this. 

It's on my todo list. I will look into these soon or late. For now, trust the timing. I wasnt keen about it because timing was off. Now it's different. I go whenever, wherever. I have ...just do this. Given one year, you add to the frequency. This is where i am.

How are you certain? There is no such thing. Tehre is reflection, you have synchronicity. Certainty comes in hindsight. You cannot predict that before-hand. You build up on clarity and self-esteem. This is what works for me.

What comes next. Spend time in this direction. You dont have to go there. It's the bitterness she wants to spread. I think he be moving on. He's gained momentum on that. It's time to move on. If i were in those shoes, i'd lie low for a while, look for replace that's cheaper less travel.

That's in the past. I dont have to dwell on that. Things are different now. I am doing deposits into this relationship. Now you see. You dont really know how things are going to turn out.

It could have gone that way. I've been giving her outs all this time and she still chooses the former. Ok. I dont have to dwell on that then. If you get injured and ignore that, you come around to it expanded. It's always expanding. You decide which way it goes.

It goes all way though. I get that. Trust the timing. I can take a nap later. I chose not to go to work today. This is what's relevant. 

In that reality experience, i have more choice. I can take the day off when it pleases me. I can choose to do runs because it sounds fun. Either way, the support is there as part of the details of that frequency.

This much i know. I build up on this frequency. It doesnt have to be fancy. Only do this, get to the other side. I dont even have to check on that. Simply do this instead. Can you be logged in to separate account with different same apps?

It should work. You can stay logged in on different accounts and computers anyway. I am sleepy. I can take a nap later. Or not. Clarence sleeps. I dont have to change much around here. 

Does it not resonate with her. I think so. I saw a different aspect of her. She likes piv now. It doesnt have to be deep. She gets that. I can play in that direction. It's all positive. You dont have to invalidate. Doing so makes it negative. 

I can still integrate if when it's negative. That's cool this way. Should i notify? I can go in that direction. Trust the timing. You get where this is going. You see how all this works out. It has to go in that way. Trust the timing. You know how these things work out. Should i notify?

movie in my mind

 it's not the same. It is never the same. I focused on self, hence went into relapse. I learned a lesson there. Heal self by helping others.

Lesson learned. I see in my mind's eye why how it's not the same river. It never is. You did not lose six years. You woke up because of that, and now you have an eternity to live. That's the lesson. You got something out of this. 

She has wisdom. I am surprised how different she is. This is my gift. I am ok now. I relapsed but i got something out of it. Now i continue. I have clarity. I have healing. I healed my self. I dont have to heal others. 

But that's how you heal--by helping others. I see that now. I am not the same person. Neither is she. The difference is that she is committed to building up this relationship. The difference from the hive community is the insight and perspective.

You go up a level to change the level you are on. You wont find solutions on that same level. You gotta move up. This was the lesson. I move on. I have accelerated. Things are not the same. I am broke but things are different this time. 

The bitcoin account works. I can work with that. This is what's relevant at this time. I can work with that. Price is above 22k. What was i writing about. We grocery later. For now she needs to work. How to continue on with this. I can pay that off.

The afterpay can go next week. For now, focus on this. You know what it is you are doing. I can get the clothes hang after this. This is my priority. I can do plenty. Now i have clarity. I dont have to see all the way through. I only need to see enough for here and now.

I take it one day at a time. Live in day-tight compartments. This is key. Why is that not available anymore. Maybe something happened to the org? It could be. But this is the idea. I am moving forward with this. I can easily add more later. 

For now, healing the here and now. Once you have used up this energy, you accelerate to a whole new level. You got something out of this. You show. You add to the experience. This is what's different. You see how you are different at each moment. This is what's relevant.

Ok. You have that working. How do you leverage it up. We work together. It doesnt have to be just you. The confluence of perspectives is key. I can work with this. Move on and forward. 

What next. I hang the clothes. I clean the toilet. The barista machine needs de-scaling. I have plenty on my todo list. Also need to get the tennis balls. I can work with that. Ok. Lets get going there. 

If you want to move beyond this, you get out of the self and help others. This was an important lesson for me. I learned much with this. I see why this is here. I see the present. I am grateful. 

Is this a lesson you can impart? I dont have to go at their level. It takes different perspective. It'snot the same. It's positive if i say it so. I have choice. I got something out of this. And it's all positive. 

The perspective alone is priceless. It's not fleeting. It's not an illusion. You get why this is so. You dont have to go there fight that. It's the illusion. Now you see. What happens here.

I think you see the point. We make love tonight. I'm excited. I look forward to it. I go like dexter but in the bed. Aha. That is beautiful. That is elegant in that way. I choose alignment. I choose resonance. 

This is what you got out of it. This is the lesson on here. I can sit here all day and write. This is the lesson for me. This is the present. We can head out again. I see things differently. How do you balance it out. Not sure, but i have resonance.

clarity using tools

 my healing will not come from you. It's not conditional on what happens on the outside. Answer this--where whence does healing come from?

You have your answer. Dont think. The answer is there. Expand in this frequency. That's the point to all this. This is the gift. You dont have to manifest this on the outside. Know that it's there for you. 

This is the gift. You dont have to heal anyone else. It doesnt work that way. You can give off that frequency. If when its relevant for them, then they too will experience healing. But this is all that is from your perspective. Know that this is what's relevant for you here and now.

I move on from with this. I know. I dont have to trust what is on the outside. Thisis the insight. You had plenty presents from this experience context. Do you see how it's not the same river. You gained much wisdom from this context.

You too have leveled up in synchronicity. This is the gift. The price you paid is small compared to the gift that which manifested. It had to happen otherwise you will not break that shell. Given this insight, you see how you gained much from the experience.

Everyone else, they dont have these insights. It doesnt mean they are less. It just meansthey were part of the experience to happen in this reality. Leave it at that. Let it go. They have served its purpose. Now it's different for you. 

You have the tools all along. You can move forward expand accelerate from here. It doesnt matter. It's all context. They come out with that only shows who they are. It reveals more of who they are. You did not flaunt it then. Things are different now.

You can choose to go or not. You have this gift. That's what you got out of all this experience. I am not the same person. It's not the same river. This much i have. I can move on now. It's not the same river.

I dont have to dwell on that. If it goes awol...i dont need that but it is for peace of mind? No. I dont have to dwell on that. I can and have moved forward. This is the healing experience for me. It's not. You see how it's not the same anymore.

I got something out of it then. I have something way much more. It is this awareness. It is this awareness that all is connected. I dont have to invalidate. It happened for a reason. And now it's not the same anymore. It's an echo. It moves farther away every time the awareness is there. 

It's not the same boat. Even if the context looks the same, it's not the same energy. She can choose to go back to that. It doesnt matter to me now. I have gained something out of it.

I move on from here. It's not the same river. I have experience. This is priceless. I have this energy again. I have awareness of my own energy. Maybe there is more to this. I'm not sure. But it happened that way and things were never the same. 

I got tools from this shift and i learned how to use them. It doesnt have to involve mastery. I have clarity. This is better for me. I see how this is all different now. I dont need mastery. I have clarity. You see the difference there. 

It doesnt matter what they do with this. I can give guidance if needed, but you gotta spend time with this. You gotta build it up learn how to use the tools before you actually need or use them. That's ...it can be in the moment you learn.

Aha. Keep it coming. Be open to the experience. You got something out of it anyway. You can check out or not. But you'll know where to find me just in case. It moves on. I dont have to. I canchoose not to dwell on that. 

Things are different now. I was right when choosing that. But it's not me anymore. I got something out of it. I can choose to analyse that make sense out of it. But it wouldnt make sense. It just had to happen. It happened for a reason. 

jeans jacket fits

 i'm not sure what i feel. There's energy on there, higher than usual. Perhaps i'm putting too much thought into this? Observe. Allow. I am recharging batteries.

We headed to ballarat. Hotel, walkabout friday, saturday we do sovereign hill all day. There's a lot to take in. Simply cross to the other side. When we get back, it's back to work. At least we get to spend time together this way.

I'm a different man. I shifted. I resonate differently. It's never the same river twice. I use up the energy in this way. Do i bring laptop? I use that to write but other than that, it sits in the bag all day. 

I can maybe skip. Or i can log in during off time maybe watch something, idk. Trust the synchronicity. It's all here and now anyway. We leave earlier as she sick, called in sick for the day. We be getting food for son. Easy way around is to get take-out.

Gopro batteries are recharging. If i were to bring charger, it's for these. But then again, it can recharge off the phone charger. I'll bring that instead. Wife also uses that. You see how this works out. I bring clothes with me. It's going t oget cold so no need for that.

Two more batteries are recharging. See how this works out? It's all connected. This was a reflection for me. I get it now. Things are different. Trust the timing on this. How's that working for you. I think there is that. I can work something out here. 

I got ...someone tipped eleven bucks yesterday. That's cool. It must be one of those that asked for extra effort. I'm ok with going upstairs. I see this as part of the job service. At times i have resistance, but i use this as insight to go into awareness.

I dont have to guard over her all the time. I think it's work-related call as it sounds like skype. Things are way different this way. I can do all day if need to like do 12-hour runs. Also there is the trading thing. It's all connected. I am building up on this.

Nothing trades like that so i trade this futures version so i'm covered in this way. Trust the synchronicity. Am i having anxietys? It feels like it. Observe. I have negative definitions and insistence in place. This helps to ease things up with the energy.

I get that. The jeans jacket fits again. I can close it. I'm back to that weight level? It seems like it. I've never been to this on the belt holes tho. It's way deep that the current state is loose. I may have to dig a hole into that soon. Where does it stop? Not sure. I'm still having fun with this.

Maybe i work too hard, think too much. I am aware of that. Why not tune in to podcasts or something. I can work with that. It is the sponsorship that way. There is too much effort into that. You observe these things. We leave after lunch or something.

She has work still. I was offering to not go but she insisted on going. So we go. Should i go left-handed? It's a long journey but it's going to be positive in the long term. Start taking steps in this direction then. Do i bring my racket. I can play with it inside the room while she works. 

We be playing all day today, then tomorrow, do some tours. One soon as we're in, the next before bedtime or so. Play as it goes...or something like that. I forgot how that term phrase goes. Things are different. You cant change the past. I guess it's why things were so neg at that time. I couldnt shake it off but there was something that's off.

Now you see in hindsight. This time, i dont have to look around. That was a present. It had to happen that way. This too is synchronicity. You get how this work. I guess i wasnt primed up back then and things could have closed out different. 

Or not. You get the idea. She talks to her sister. Does dog want to go down. Dog is awake. Waiting for her to finish up and or these batteries to finish charging. In the meantime, i use up the energy this way by writing it out. Dont want to process things in my head.

This helps. I continue in this path. I have the guiding constitution. I check into that regularly, throughout the day. It helps me sort things out. This is the path for me. I ...will it help if i chat with her? She too did not know about these things until full disclosure. Trust the timing.

had to happen

 wife leaving for work. It's been good lately. Imagine us being this close. It's a consequence of that thing happening. I'm not invalidating. All this was integrated and now a positive thing. 

This is why it had to happen. If not, we'd simply drift into old age full of anger and resentment. That's not me. That's not what i prefer. This was a big lesson for me. It's a present. It's not consequence...or something negative. It's a gift because the closeness and intimacy was not something i expected.

Our intimacy goes beyond just sex. We enjoy each other's company. We talk. We spend time together. It's that shared meaningful experience from the mission statement. I need to change that too. It sounds too corporate. Guiding principles.

That sounds better. Now you have guidance. It's been there all along. I was open and got the information and insight i needed. I am thankful. I am thankful in every way. I dont have much money right now and it's ok. I have synchronicity. It's always been there. At times i lose track of how this works.

It never leaves us. This is connection. This is all that is. Aha. There. That was a very comforting thought. You dont have to make things happen. It's like starting over. Let it be ok. I do yoga. My foot is better now. I be doing stuff so be it. Let it be ok this way.

Celsius is sideways. I can work with that but will this leverage and scale? Definitely so. It's boring and all that but you get the idea. Let's get going again. This is part of my synchronicity. I have coffee then do yoga. 

I leave after yoga. The stretch is an integral part of this. We head out to ballarat tomorrow. This is exciting. We bonded last night...it rained. It was great. I still learn with every event and it's great. You explore this one and there's a lot.

How then. Simply be open. This is the part. I dont have to declare that and this is where i am. I dont have to go there even. It's the losses you can work with. If for now you dont have that, so be it. I can declare losses but i dont have the information for that.

They have it. They just want to see if you have the same. This is part of the process. Let it be that way. You are building up into this. I dont have to negate that invalidate. This is a reflection. You see how easy these things are.

It's great really. At times i feel small. That's ok. This too is a reflection. I learn more about my self in this way. I explore the small. I go this way and that. There is plenty on here. Action is key. You use up the energy in this way.

That was in the past. It's not the same. You simply get going and you resonate with the energy. This is what i do now. What comes next. Continue on this path. Things will unfold. Do the instruction manual. You'll know it in perfect timing. 

This is what i do throughout the day then. It's all uphill. That's ok. Simply get going. You'll know what to do. I get tired but i rest. And tomorrow till saturday is day off. I have all this in place. Trust the timing in this way. 

How else to generate revenue off that. Do the two hour thing. You get how this works. You can zoom in on the us open. You trade off that. This is interesting. I can work with that. You get how that works anyway. Let's get going with that.

I start tonight. It's around ten or eleven and she's just about getting ready for bed that way. I takes a nap and i be ok watching that market. She goes to bed early anyway. Or do the london open but i'm just about getting ready to go home.

You get the idea. This one scales up plus leverage. This is where you be at. Let's do this then. You get that often enough. You dont want trending. You simply trade in this way. Trust the timing. Do i have ops?

Is it that reliable. Why not zoom in a bit. How much zoomed in? 15? I'm not sure about this one. You get all that and it seems off that way. Go back up a level to h2. It's less trades but you see these things anyway.

withdrew usdt to fiat

 i'd like to have resonate with thi sexperience. This is one way of doing it. Maybe possible to do brompton bike-about when travel? You cant do holding hands but makes it easy to move around. Look into this. It doesnt have to be high.

This is resonating with me. I like this energy. I am open. It can go this way or that. Either way, i get something out of it. The unknown is my friend as i learn more about myself in this way.

It rained this morning. It was intimate, then moved to sensual. This is the path process i explore. It doesnt have to have expectations insistence on the outcome. Assumptions? Kinda ok i guess, not to overdo this though. Just be open. This is the way.

I can choose to dwell on that, or put this in my awareness. I can get stuff when i head out. It still light rains though. This works for me. What comes next. I get going in this direction. I think you have more than enough on here. Trust the timing.

She be busy with work for now. You get where this is going. We work in that direction or this and that. In the meantime, this is where i am. I be building up in this direction. What comes next. Not really sure. But i have resonance. This is where i am. I dont have to insist on the outcome. Simply being open, enjoy the ride. 

The local doesnt have all that anyway. This is what resonates with me. Things are way different now. It is a reminder, nothing else. Or it can be something else. It is all up to you. That is the lesson for me. This way it becomes positive. No side to side that way.

You get that. Trust the timing. Plenty hills in that way. I can work with that. You get how these things work out. What if that were already closed? Aha. That will be cool. For the first time, i helped her close it out. That feels great. This is where i resonate. 

What comes next. We have a pool on this. I build up in this direction as well. Over time, we accumulate on that and close out the account. But in the meantime, use fiat to build up asset. Fiat loses its value so using this to build up the account. 

I think this is ok. It's not too leveraged in that way. I can go this way and that. What are my options next. Simply do this. Cross over to the other side see how it works out. I can do this and that. You see. Where do the cars park? It coud be above the hill.

That's a nice way for tourists. I woder how these things work out. I have anxiety. I get that. I did not sell bitcoin. I held to position and instead got a loan for the consumers. It's low interest so it works out in the long term. So long as the position grows, this works out for all of us.

This has to be a better way. I can add transferwise on to that account. The new name is too common. They should do something else. But that's them. Someone else might may have already beat them to it. I get the rx, then i go grocery then i head back. This is the way now. Trust the timing in this way. 

I have plenty. I have feedback. This is the way. Do you even have to trade in this way. Maybe. Or not. But you see how all this works out. Will it hold up above that. It could. But you see this is good for you. I can get in at a much lower price then see how to build up from there. It's all connected.

I head out shortly. At least she has spending money ...no, the better relevant idea is peace of mind. There you go. That's what you have resources for. It's for the energy. I was going to say spirit but that has baggage to it.

Ok. Cousin was buried laid to rest. Somehow these words do not work for me. Remains were buried. There has to be a different way to express that idea. In the meantime, not here so it's not relevant. Are they related in some way. I can work with that.

Her and the kids will enjoy walking around there. It's my turn now. I've been waiting on this. I should have acted instead. That's how the energy works expands. Now i know. Things are not the same. Never the same river twice. This works out. This is. 

I have negative filters on. I sense that. Observe. No need to invalidate. I've already written but writing works for me. I can work something out. It's all open. The next step is in that direction. Get this sorted and you'll know what to do next. How to go there.

positive reality experience

 i'm sleepy. It rained early this morning. She stayed on, lingered. That was positive for me. I'm a different man now. I am not the man she married years ago. 

I've integrated this negative into a a neutral, meaningless situation--even positive at best. The relationship is stronger. We talk a lot. We spend time a lot. We hold hands when we are together. I'm different. She too is not the same person. 

It's like i'm getting to know this new girlfriend that i just met a while ago. It's great. Next step of me is getting work done. I've been sick these past few days--physical and spirit are connected. I know this and this experience showed me how it was.

Again, this is integration. I have pain on there. Trust the timing. It's there for a reason. Wife is making lunch. We head out after lunch. I finish washing the dishes immediately after finish meal. She be preparing anyways before we go. Tonight is wimbledon finals. We be up late again.

What now. Finish up. Get to the other side. This is how things are and it's all good. It's all positive in this way. Do i even have to message them. It's not sincere now is it? Because it will reflect back to you the negative intention. Leave it be. It's not the same river twice. 

What then. Finish up writing. Tomorrow i go to work. I do extra ten km each day and i guess this is connected. I be stronger in this way so it is connected. Maybe i can leave the bike on there or something. Is it secure?

Not really sure but i can work something out. I saw that earlier before. I had extra cash and spent it on junk i dont really need. Now i know. It's in my awareness now. It's not the same river. What to do next. Finish up. Maybe i can take a nap or something. Bring those stuff.

Or i can do something different altogether. I guess so. We been there before. It gets easier. I can map out directions this way. Or not. Still it works out the same way. I can do full-on video tonight when we get back. I can take a nap later even. 

It's up until 2am. I can work something out. Or maybe it becomes easy and that is a level of mastery you dont see anywhere else. It is also plenty mental games at that level. I can work something out. Maybe do a video of her so she can see how she plays.

I think that will work for her. I can turn it off anyway when done. But the thing makes a lot of noise. How to work with that. Maybe there is concentration going on. Other than that, you can work something out instead. I ordered a racket last night. It should be here tuesday perhaps.

Hoping it be earlier. We get up early to play in the park. This is shared meaningful experience. It's in the mission statement. I go this way. It's easy with afterpay and i get better at doing this. Also trading is on full-swing.

It's all lined up this time. You get where this is going. How to trade this. Trust the timing. After it heads up on there, you can do something else. In the meantime, work your way through this. Use up the energy. I take a nap later.

Why did i go there anyway. What was the motivation. It was perception. Me thinking i am better, comparing. This is the lesson i got from all this. I'm not guarding bantay on her but sincerely want to spend time with her, get to know her.

It's different now and i hardly know her the past several years. I see a different wife partner this time. I didnt see much of this before. Plus i learned much in the process. I have a skill that's not common on there. 

The other had to use external tools to get what he wanted. I was more about giving to her than getting what i want. I get what i want better after she gets hers. That's the difference. I think she can tell. I dont have to compare myself and ask about these things.

I can tell given the context so far. I'm glad she did not go on with that direction. It would have been hard for her. We both got something positive out of this situation. I'm glad i came back. It's never the same without her anyway. It's what all this was about, but now it feels like the frequency shifted higher.

invalidate here now

 just do this. Stay here and now. You dont have to make sense of it. Stay within your power. This is what's relevant here and now.

I'm in pain. This reflects in my body with the pain and health issues. I have it inmy awareness now. Simply observe. I dont have to go there. Just do this. I chose to dwell on that. Now i choose different.

You dont have to control what's on the outside. Simply resonate. The outside doesnt have power over you. It's all here and now. This is what i go through now. It's in my awareness. 

Just get to the other side. That's all you do. Connect. You can go this way or that. She was affected last night. That's the price you pay. She's willing and here connected now. Why is that. She was old and they have that business.

It's not that great on there. You put in a lot and you are hardly keeping up. That's a tough business. How do you trade this. You sit for that, then go full on when you get there. You know how to read these. Trust the timing.

What comes next. You simply focus here and now. Get to the other side. If not here now, do something else. Do fifteen. Do the extra mile. Get going. You got this. The extra time will work out to resonance. 

Rest if you must. That's part of the reflection. You got this. You grow in this endeavor pursuit? What if you chose that. You see how this works out. You can choose. You have let go anyway.

Was that me. Why focus on that. It's already different. Who do you talk to about these things. I can choose that, or do something else. Action is key. I wasnt there really. But the shut me down. She gave up on me soon as there was someone on the side.

She's admitted to that. All that is different now. This is what i do. It's not that you avoid going there, but that the frequency is different. You get how this is different in every way. She shut me down then gave up, lied cheated. I can dwell on that, or simply put that in my awareness.

This too is practice. You know how to work these things. You have choice. That's power. This is awareness. You have it. Others dont have it this easy. You got this. I guess this is the dominant force here.

What comes next. Simply do this. There is a sadness to it. You dont have to invalidate. Simply do this. I heads out. Do the usual, then take a day off. This is more than enough. You got this. 

You dont have to go there that way. Simply this then get to the other side. I think you see how this works out. Then you can create something else. I got this. Did we have coffee yesterday. That was good cofee right there. 

It was full and people lined up for it. How now. I was tired. I knew and went there. You got this. She too was tired and knew. Trust the timing on this one. That wasnt real. Why dwell on that. Aha. Something to process. You dont have to.

Get something else to process this time. I dont have to dwell on that. Simply do this get to the other side. What comes next. You have other things in mind. Wasnt yours all this time. Why so sudden a change. 

You dont have to make sense of that. You only have here and now. That's key. Stay in this energy frequency. Here and now. This is the practice for you. Choose. You have choice in all this. 

I stay here and now. No invalidate. Observe. This is practice. Thisis how i use up the energy. No invalidate as that doesnt work. You already know that. Simply do this. What comes next. I'm not sure. Just do this.

observe allow accept

 i need what? Resolution? It's over and done with. I am not in the present. I am either trying to process what happened in the past, or anxious about the future. 

No need to change these. Simply put them in your awareness for now. There were reasons, but it's so much to process. You have insights about these. Simply put them in your awareness. That's the best you can do at this time. She's committed. Or she may not. But all that is in the future. Put it in the present.

Dog backs down when i say no. I think he wants to play. I am upset. I have been triggered all afternoon. I have low self-esteem. I compare everything with everyone. I have a death wish? What's happening here. How do you wish this to be. Not back to normal, that we are in a loving relationship.

Take it one day at a time. You have no control over the future. What will be will be. But if you dont love here here now and today, i dont think the future will be there for you, or it's going to be all no alignment. 

Am i second fiddle now. I feel like she be hiding something? I dont think so. She's there for you. If the other were to text, then the wife will know. Not all the time she is there. If he be at work, he could have a backup phone. How do you work through these. 

Should i check her phone? There's not much i can do to check. Why not simply let go. Go get an apartment. It doesnt matter what people say. Go self-destruct if you choose to. You need to go through this. Does it get better?

Do i need therapy? Eventually yes. Why not go now. Why wait till things are so down it affects the kids. Is it a waste of time to spend time with her.  I am in pain. Spiritual pain. Mental pain. What do i do. How do you recover? Take it one day at a time.

Go spiritual. Not religion. Do the instruction manual. That's more than enough for now. You cant change that past. It's a perception. When you break it down like that, it becomes manageable. I'm not saying easier. It's easy to get under the hood and do something about it.

For now, breathe. Do the instruction manual. Just do these. You dont have to make sense of it. You dont have to make her love you even. Just be. Put yourself first. She works. She's always working. And now i found out if not, she spends time with the other guy.

I have this in my awareness. I dont have to dwell on that. Just do here and now. Work on that commitment to her that i be here now, help with the bills, take care of her. Just do that. She too has her own commitments. That's enough for now. Trust the timing.

You'll be ok eventually. Just do these. I have these in my awareness. I can work in this direction. What about those quiet alone times. Meditate. Put it in your awareness. Breathe. This are a lot to carry. You are doing just fine.

It's here for a reason. You put meaning into it. I can take a nap. Or simply do this. I dont think she's watching. I write. This is part of the therapy for me. Why not write how this is going to turn out.

At some point, he starts to trust her. I'm not going to find anything in there. Just leave it be. If they are in touch, they know how to hide it better this time. They wont be careless this time. I am not me. Switch. I have it in my awareness. 

How come i triggered like this. I was ok in the morning. Maybe i am tired. I did do something good. I finished the quest. I did 19 runs. That was good. I am exchausted. Not really. I'm ok. It was a lot. I take a break tomorrow and friday.

We checked in to a hotel. It's in the past. You got something out of it. Yes. We are connecting more. That's ok. You dont need to have insistence on the outcome. Connecting is good. Trust the timing. It'll grow. Trust the timing.

You dont even have to. Simply observe. No need to insist on how this will turn out. She knows understands what you are going through. That's more than enough for now. Why process everything. It's all here and now. Just do this. This is more than enough.

we ok now

 the chart doesnt look so bullish. The last swing low stopped short of the lower bands. This be bullish signal or something.

We ok now. After talking with her mom, i decided she's done already. We changed our monthsary. We talk a lot, spend time together. I am not the same person. This had to happen. I turned it positive. This is here and now. I didnt think i'd make it through, but i did...we did. 

We are much better for the experience. I simply held on hoping things get better. Not exactly hoping but knowing to simply be open to what is. I feel less stressed. I was able to take a nap before dinner.

We going to that hotel for an overnight stay this thursday. I dont have to see where the next step is coming from. What if this works. That is different now. It's not the same boat and it's all positive. I keep asking what's next. I rides tomorrow. It's the third.

I did not hit my target today. I chose to meet wife for lunch...join her for lunch. She invited me anyway. I had coffee as i was crashing. We finished around 1. I was thinking of going home to sleep. After the first run, i was ok. I'll hit 19 tomorrow.

I may have to do doubles. That makes time to go much faster. That means eight runs but it's all together. She looks native. I think this is so. She in the shower. It's not the same boat. What if it's hidden. I dont think so. Her mom is involved now.

Things are way different now. I can sleep tonight. Save this up for tomorrow. I'm not as tired today. This is second day runs. I do yoga tomorrow before i head out. These are great and it's all about the show this way. How to render.

What does it mean. You simply shift resonate into that frequency. This is where we are. I was headed into that but there was enough awareness that it turned into something positive. This is what the practice is about. This is top four. 

I think one more is going home. The dog is on the couch. Why did i correct edit. Continue on. Things are back to normal but different. There is quiet now in my heart, in my head. This is good. It's not the same river. Why does she shower on there. 

It is weird. Maybe she cleans the bathroom. The phone is out here anyway. No need for that. Its all done. We got something out of it. We continue on with this get to the other side. I had issues from last night. I have this on observe. 

I dont have to go to bed early. Just do this. I can work on that early. I leave early? Not sure. Wife leaves early. I can work something out. Like what. Not sure. Just do this. I have it good then. And this is going to the other side.

And then what. Dog wants to play? I think so. There be whiskey into this. I think that is a restaurant. What can you get and not sure what to write about this. Get to the other side. They dont have to bring everyone along. That is costly.

Finish up. Is there something else. That power cable is on the way. Should i hang out in my desk. I get sleepy quick there. That is a fire hazard. It is boiling. He is ready to have dinner now. What did he do all day.

I'm not sure but you have this on resonance. Get to the other side. I can check the wallet and see how it works out. I can close out that trade, but then again, it's not about that. You have that to adjust the colateral.

It works both ways. Keep to this. Let it run. I only close out the shorts. The bitcoin longs stay and accumulated over time. I would rather short alts than to sell my longs. Anyways, just finish up and you continue on with the night.

I dont know how that is relevant. Simply do this then. What is that about. I am sleepy here. It's all different colors. This gets to the other side. What's he doing. What is that ad about. Cousin passed away recently. Man. We are out one at a time. And it's all this and that.

find positive then build

 i have gout. I started to notice a small swelling on that big toe. There was pain and took paracetamol. Should i be working? 

Cynthia reachedout. Stella sent me an email. These two are some of the mother-side cousins i love. What if this was all for show? What if she's just bidding her time until circumstancs...the stars line up for her and him?

I saw what he looks like--typical laborer. At least he's got a job and probably doing well. How do i move on with this. Focus on the positive, then build up from there. That's the lesson in this. Also thati have a share of the cause and effect on this. 

The time from nz to recent i practically gave up on her, was headed out the door except that we had kids, stayed for the kids' sake. I realised that i stayed on somehow hoping (desperate) that things work out. Also htat i didnt have work. I hated work i had, customer service.

I can still go out. I'll take a nap shortly. Do the 15, be on fast for the next three days. This cleans up the system and the pain gout will be short-lived. I am greatful that people reached out. I can skip today, rest this up. But if i did, i wouldnt ...the fast wouldnt go as easy. 

Finish these, see what you have in about an hour. Decide from there. Also need to tell wife about this. Is it too early? She gave you a shot. It lasted as long as it did but the last six wasnt real.

I keep going back to that. See this as a dream you were not aware of or something. Now you are awake. Here and now. Stay here. You dont even have to process the past, figure things out. What's important is here and now.

This is an opportunity to do the instruction manual. I just gained one more key to this--action, behavior in the here and now. I wasnt. I lacked in that aspect. Now i know. Things have indeed fallen into place.

About this, you have thisin your awareness. It's not the same river...never is was. It's not different anymore. She cares a lot about you. That was a distraction for her. She acted on the instruction manual herself. 

That's something else. I never thought of it that way. Now you have better clarity on that. This time around, she is acting on her excitement following the instruction manual--but with you.

Do you see how that insight turned things around? This is a reflection for you. Now you see it. Build up go in this direction. You now have something to build on. This is where its headed. No insistence on the outcome. Take it one day at a time.

I heads out. I can spend time with the son when i get back. It's dark in his room. Either he's sleeping or idk. But he's usually up at this time making breakfast. Need to intervene into this. Let's see how this works out. He needs intervention.

No need to question. Thisis here for you. I tend to invalidate looking for a one to one reflection with insistence on how things should turn out. It doesnt work that way. I can have coffee?

The phones are recharging. The foot isnt that painful. She goes to work tomorrow. Can i trust her then. I dont want to be a burden here. Maybe we can go. Maybe he didnt want to walk, didnt bother asking for help.

I can work with that. This could be why the gout is here. We are going through this. I think we need to speak with that psych. It costs much, but it helps a lot. How then. Continue on. There is history into this. It worked somehow.

Build in this direction. Let's see how this works out. What comes next on here. I'm not sure. Simply be open, but you are an active character in this story. You make things happen. If not, it just drifts along and takes chapters to finish. Have coffee.