it feels sad down here. It's different in this way. So this is how it feels like. I have the dog to keep me company. What does he want?
Three more saturdays. It feels like forever...it feels the same, but it's all different this time. That's the point. It is different. Even if it were just this, it's not the same anymore.
Me determines how i respond to this. It's good to retreat on this. Imagine i am on a retreat and practice mindfulness. It's tough this way, but that's the point. I migth as well fast as well.
I just got back from tennis. I am hungry, but i dont feel like eating anymore. I saw earlier that it doesnt matter what's on the outside. It's what you are from the inside. It's the clarity inside.
It's not what you think the future is going to be like. Why be sad about it. Who knows. What can i do different here. I run tomorrow. I fast tonight then run tomorrow morning.
This kicks in the dopamine reverse. This lasts me through to lunch, more so later. I can go for that. I can live off the coffee. I was feeling anxious this morning but i made it through.
The thing is to keep redefining. It may look bleak, but that's the old me looking into the past, projecting the past into the future. It may can be like that, but it is entirely different in every way.
You get this. You have guidance. Trust that this is part of the synchronicity. I have the audience im building up. Just do this get to the other side. You dont have to be in that league, but you get the point. I can go for marathon by november next year.
I think i can build a good base itm. I can finish that race marathon, but it's not going to be so fast. It's something i keep going onto. I've always wanted to join one. This time around i think i have enough momentum going for me.
I am starting a channel on this. What comes next. How to bring that thing with me. I'm not really sure. But you have this anyway. I can order another one. This is long enough. It's enough for now. I can look for that other one.
I think i know where it is. ...it's not there. Keep open. You'll see where it is. In the meantime, just work with what you have. It's around here so you'll find it somehow. At least this one looks ok.
I can easily order another one if needed. In the meantime, just do this. What comes next. I'm not really sure. I can work something out. I have this much on here. You get where this is going.
I dont have to dwell on that. Just work your way through to three saturdays. That's i dont know. I forgot. That's not 21 days. I can countdown into that. Or not. Just enjoy the moment.
You can't wish it to be here. You are not in teh moment this way. I can write abou these things. There is work. There is tennis. There is running. I have the channel to grow. I can ...i am going to be ok.
For one, the fasting plus running just feels great. Get to that frequency each and every morning. It's going to tide you over and you'll feel great about this. Trust the timing. You get how this works.
I am getting sleepy now. Finish up then get ready for bed. I can wake up early and then get to work. I have naps in between. You get how to work with this. Everyone is on the same boat. You have synchronicity.
